Christmas Headlines
by Moriarty Hooper and Holmes Inc
Summary: COMPLETE! The gang spends Christmas together, same old antics from overly helpful friends-evil reporters- a confused Ups man and the beautiful awkwardness that is Heero and Relena! Misunderstanding and silliness ensues!You've been warned!PLEASE REVIEW!
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own Gundam Wing this is simply for my own amusement**

**AN: I have been out of the game for years so bear with me here people. I have a few other stories under a different pen name from years back (to embarrassing to reveal) The show may no longer be on the air but I know there are still some us that have a special place for these characters in our hearts. So after many years of growing up and completely ignoring anime and fan fiction altogether I found my way back to my very first obsession. I have this story outlined in my head but and suggestions and stories ideas would be much appreciated...especially if they are funny! So here I go..... **

Chapter One:

Extra Extra READ ALL ABOUT IT!

"They love her and are devoted to her but….they have their own lives. I need some with her at all times that has absolutely nothing to loose."

"I understand."

"I need you to take care of her by any means necessary "

"Mission accepted."

"I mean more than her physical life…"

"Mission has already been accepted."

~*~

_**And**_ _**The Headlines Read….**_

"_**Relena Peacecraft's New Love Interest….." **_

Relena's eyes widened in horror as the first tabloid was flopped down on the table in front of her…..

"_**The Princess Finally Meets Her Prince Charming….."**_

Her entire body tensed as she looked up at the rather large stack of glossy paper in the young mans arms as he laid out each one in front of her….

"_**The Dove Of Peace And War Hero In Love-The Juicy Details Inside…." **_

"_**Princess Falls In Love With Bodyguard-How Romantic!"**_

"_**Is Relena Planning A Secret Wedding? We have The Inside Scoop…." **_

Relena mortified turned to give them man standing behind an angry glare "I told you this would happen…but no let's not listen to Relena …."

The red faced man with the long braid could barely contain his laughter anymore as he shoved the last on in front of her "I thought we were friends Relena? You think you'd tell me if you were seeing some one!" he chuckled.

Yes, the last one was defiantly the worst….

"_**IF Walls Could Talk…" **_The last was a picture of Heero beginning to shut a dressing room door with Relena's back to the camera holding a stack of clothing.

"Heero Yuy If I still had a career it would be completely ruined." She said paper slowly crumbling under her grasp.

Relena was angrier than words could describe. Ever since she stepped down from her position as Vice foreign minister her guard detail had been stripped from her leaving her unprotected at all times. Millardo of course had flown off the handle and after many arguments and death threats had managed to persuade Kernel Une to allow one Preventer at all times to be on guard duty. The stipulation was that it was strictly volunteer basis….Millardo was not aloud to hand pick who he wanted guarding her sister. Luckily for Relena the men who stepped up were none other than Duo Maxwell and Wufei Chang. However after the kidnapping attempt from a deranged young man who had thought she'd stepped down from her position because she finally realized how much she was in love with him and thought it was time the two of them rode off together toward the sunset…

Well her brother took it upon himself to track down Heero (A task that strangely didn't take much time) and practically beg his former arch nemesis to make Relena his full time job. Apparently he'd agreed because the next morning she awoken to Heero leaning back in a chair right in front of her closed door.

At first she'd been happy about the arrangement but that feeling was quickly replaced with annoyance….

It didn't take long for him to remind her he was still as cold and unemotional as he'd always been. In the three weeks during his shifts they'd yet to have a single conversation. When at home he simply sat in the farthest place from her in whatever room she was occupying with his nose either stuck in a book or eyes intently on the screen of his laptop.

Public wasn't much better. He would simply walk beside her with his arms crossed and eyes constantly darting around looking for any impending threat. Any attempts on Relena's part toward a conversation were simply answered with disinterested "yes's" and "no's" And if ever asked a question that he could not give that she would only get a "Hn"

"Seriously buddy I thought we were friends? How come I had to find out about this at the news stand?" Duo teased "I get to be the best man right?"

"Its just petty gossip I've done nothing more than my job." Heero said monotone.

"Petty Gossip?" Relena shrieked "Someone coughed in the theatre and you had me on the ground…"

"How Romantic….." Duo gave a long dreamy eyed sigh.

Heero simply shifted his body weight to his other leg and shrugged "I can't be too careful."

"What about clearing out the women's restroom and standing outside my stall?"

"You did what?" asked Duo obviously flabbergasted "That's a little extreme…and in no way romantic!"

"I had to secure the perimeter."

"Defiantly not romantic." Duo muttered

Relena let her head fall onto the table in defeat "I finally have time for a boyfriend and now the entire world thinks I am involved" she sighed.

Duo looked a Heero with a pleading glance and was only returned with a blank expression "Her Brother is going to be pissed!"

Her eyes darted up to her friend and body guard…Millardo. Yes he would be angry. Maybe he would fire Heero….a small smile crept to Relena's face.

"_Ring"_

"_Ring" _

She turned to give Heero a smug smirk as she went to press the button to her Video phone.

"Millardo…so nice of you to call!" she said happily awaiting his fit of rage.

Unfortunately she was only met with a worried expression "How are you holding up?"

Relena's smile turned sour "I'm not happy about this…I think Heero needs to be relieved of his duties."

"No Relena he's the best out there and your lucky to have him."

"Lucky? Are you kidding me? I feel like a prisoner in my own house. He's obsessive and unpleasant to be around. The tabloids are completely his fault."

Millardo just sighed "Let me talk to Heero for a moment."

Heero moved from his spot on the wall as Relena turned to screen towards him. "Zechs, this will blow over."

"Yuy lighten up ok? She's not a politician anymore and in a few years she's probably wont even a guard."

"I'm doing my job." He said emotionless

Duo pushed Heero to the side as he brought his big grin to the screen "So what? You're not even worried that some of these rumors might true?"

Millardo let an amused laugh escape his lips "Not in the least."

"He sleeps in her room!" Duo pushed.

He just gave Heero a wary glance "Lighten up?"

"Acknowledged."

"Relena I think its best that until this blows over you stay with Quatre, he'll be staying at his estate in Switzerland over Christmas and the media will be unable to enter the grounds."

"Only on one condition" she argued "Heero won't be my guard while I am there."

He simply shook his head "I'm sorry Relena I gave Duo and Wufei time off for Christmas."

Duo and Millardo gave her a sympathetic look as she turned her head slightly to glare at Heero "Fine."

~*~

She threw the suitcases on her bed and immediately started throwing random items into them. Relena was too angry to care what she packed. Any other brother would have flown off the handle at the allegations and Heero's ass would have been immediately shipped off to either space or Antarctica. It seemed that they got along better now than they did during the war; Heero spoke more words to her brother during their brief phone conversation than he'd spoken to her in three weeks….

And that just pissed her off.

She caught a peek of falling snow through an opening in the curtains and immediately pulled them back. She put her hand over her heart and sighed as she remembered next week was Christmas and extremely disappointed she wasn't in a jollier mood.

It had been three years since Heero had fallen into her arms unconscious. To no ones surprise Heero escaped the hospital and soon as a few back were turned. Duo would occasionally bring Heero into their conversations stating he'd shown up at preventer's headquarters, for why only Heero knew but apparently he'd made the time to have brief conversations with Duo.

She wouldn't lie up until recently she's had somewhat of a school girl crush on him. He did a very good job of making that feeling go away. But at the very least after everything thing they went through during the war they could at least have some sort of friendship.

That wasn't happening. If she wanted to translate his actions the only thing she could come up with that either he was completely repulsed by her or she was a mere annoyance.

Then why the hell did he even take the job?

"ZZZZZIP"

Relena's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Heero closing her fully packed and _folded _items of her suitcase. How long had she drifted off?

If she wasn't so aggravated he would have received a thank you as he walked out of the room to pack her belongings into the limo. Apparently she was incapable of packing her own suit case….or maybe he just had to check it for explosives…..or maybe just maybe he hand picked her clothing for the trip so he be sure she always wearing a suitable outfit for a quick getaway.

A delighted smile crept up her face as she got an idea……

If she couldn't get rid of the perfect soldier she'd make him want to leave……..

~*~

"You not doing a very good job she seems unhappy and this tabloid issue isn't helping."

"I'm doing my job."

"Not completely…"

"Apparently I'm unpleasant to be around."

"You can talk to her?"

"I don't have anything to talk about."

"Figure something out…anything…be nice…talk to her…anything. I don't need her mad at me for keeping you around."

"How long I am going to be around?"

"That's entirely up to you."


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Well I am a quick one am I not? I kept this chapter mostly serious to kind of explain a little bit about the relationships between the characters. I really would like to keep this story for the most part light and funny. PLEASE REVIEW PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE!!!! It would really make my day. Also if you have any ideas let me know!

**Chapter Two: Plane Ride**

"This is your mission should you choose to accept it…"

"Say what?"

"Find out what Relena wants for Christmas."

"Buddy I already her a gift."

"Hn"

"Ok alright…mission accepted."

~*~

"Hey princess!" Said Duo pulling Relena into a friendly yet too tight embrace as she stepped onto the plane "Surprise!"

"Duo what are you doing here? Millardo said he gave you time off?"

"Well…" he chuckled "Since your technically only aloud to have one of us working for you at a time Wu and I were lucky enough to get time off through Une."

Still a little bitter about her companion she genuinely couldn't complain about spending time with her dearest friend over Christmas "Hildie's coming to right?"

"My baby is already there." he smiled a big cheesy smile.

Some of the bitterness slowly dripped away as she looked over at Heero. At least her silver lining with him being her primary guard was that she no longer took so much time away from Duo and Wufei. Hildie and Sally were two of her closets girlfriends and it did tend to make her a little guilty when she spent more time with their boyfriends then they did. However they were the women of soldiers and dealt with the situation with a grin and a hug. She couldn't possibly ask for better friends.

"Now that I know I'm going to have you and Hildie at the same time at the same place...who else is making a surprise appearance?" she asked sitting down in her seat. Of course her perfect soldier sat in the one farthest from her.

"Well Dorothy and Trowa are already there of course." He laughed "Sally and the Wu man flew out yesterday...Noin and your big bro are leaving Mars as we speak so they will show up in a few days."

"Wow" she said a little surprised "How did this happen so quickly?"

He shrugged as if it was no big deal "Between me and your brother we can do anything. Plus the guys weren't planning on doing anything other than spending the day with their perspective women...so we figured we'd spend Christmas together again... same as last year." He laughed.

Same as last year she sighed inwardly. It was a fact that this small group had grown rather close the past three years. Save Relena for having her brother and mother none of them had any other family. She supposed that's what they had become….a family. A wave of comforting warmth enveloped her as she thought of them…her family.

Duo was defiantly the easiest person in the entire world to like, he was carefree and funny. It was difficult to believe that his life had been so tainted by war, spending five minutes in his presence made it hard to believe he's had such a harsh and cold past.

After the war Hildie joined the preventer's but her and Duo's relationship grew and they decided if they continued down the path they were on they would never have to time pursue their relationship any farther and Hildie was more than happy to quit and move into Duo's apartment, it was more than obvious she enjoyed playing house.

It had been mostly Hildie's decision for Duo to take the position in her guard. Relena's friendship with Hildie had grown when she started accompanying Duo when he escorted her to the colonies. She was always grateful to have another female around and at least it gave Duo another target to tease.

Now she wouldn't go as far as to say she and Wufei were the best of friends. She enjoyed his company as it was obvious he enjoyed hers. Despite their difference in ideals they found they had many other things in common, books mostly. But Wufei and Relena had a very precious secret that only the two shared….one that would keep their destinies intertwined for all eternity…a secret that if came out would mean complete and utter humiliation for all parties involved…..Wufei and Relena shared an undying love for…soap's. Up late one night she ventured into her study and there was Wufei…..watching a recording of the previous days episode. On the days he was assigned to her they often snuck off late at night locking themselves into her study with pop corn an ice cream for an hour.

She smiled to herself…oh if Sally ever found out….

Up until his transfer Wufei and Sally had been partners…however after rumors of a hostile work environment Wufei was at her door the morning after her brother submitted the paperwork for volunteers. Sally often dropped in to check in on her boyfriend but by the time she left the two were very much red faced…sometimes objects got broken…and leaving poor Relena almost rolling on the floor with laughter. Yes she really liked Sally. How in the world their romance had blossom she'd never understand but apparently there was a different side of Wufei that only Sally had seen….well outside of his Soap obsession.

It was common knowledge that Trowa and Quatre were practically like brothers and Trowa followed his best friend wherever he went. Wherever Quatre was you found Trowa and Dorothy. Wherever you found Trowa you found his sister Catherine. Yes Quatre had quite interesting additions to his already rather large family. Quatre seemed to enjoy every minute of it though. He always went out of his way to keep in contact with her…always inviting her to stay over for every holiday known to man and she received one phone call a week….at the least.

Her eyes were still focused blankly on Duo who continued to chatter away happily not even noticing her attention had been elsewhere. She heard Heero's body shift at the end of the plane as he continued to type on his laptop.

She'd completely avoided looking into his beautiful and mysterious eyes knowing full well if given one glace she would fall desperately back into the same silly old unrequited crush that she'd given up on years ago. Why he accepted her brother's offer after complete avoidance for three years she'd never begin to figure out but he'd made it abundantly clear he didn't want any type of relationship with her.

That appeared to include friendship.

Well that was more than alright with her and her bruised pride until his anal retentiveness got them splashed all over the morning tabloids. It had been utterly humiliating having him in her dressing room that day…she didn't have the nerve to change with him there even though he was facing the wall and knew full well he was to honorable to sneak a peek. She would just have to order online from now on. Did he really need to stand outside her bath room stall? Ok clearing out the restroom may have been unnecessary but somewhat understandable. But standing right outside her stall? She finally resolved herself to the fact she'd never be able to use the bathroom in public ever again.

Now here she was no longer the political figure with the weight of the world on her shoulders…single a free and yet so trapped at the same time. Yes here she was single and had all the time in the world to meet a guy, fall in love, settle down, get married…maybe have a child or two…and the entire world thought she was involved with a man that outside of his job obligations wanted nothing to do with her.

This was just wonderful.

"ummm Relena? Have you listened to I word I've been saying? Duo said with a small pout on his face.

She quickly shook her head and blinked a few times to get out of her dream like state" I'm sorry…"

"hmm" he looked at her quizzically "Whatcha got on your mind princess, if you don't mind me askin?"

"I've been thinking about us all being together again this year. Hopefully Wufei doesn't set your hair on fire again…"

His hands immediately wrapped around his braid in a protective fashion "Yes that was a little uncalled for…"

"Well you did kinda deserve it." She snickered

"What? I am not the one who hung it! And certainly didn't make Wufei stand there either!!" Duo said defensively

"Just because Wufei was standing under the mistletoe did not mean you had to run across the room and kiss him!"

Immediately she noticed Heero's attention being taken away from whatever he was doing on that damned lap top and raised a questioning eyebrow at duo from across the room.

Duo threw his hands into the air "Man it was only on the cheek! Everyone else thought it was funny."

Not amused in the slightest Heero's attention went back to his task.

"Seriously I think that man should have a funny bone transplant because I think his was obliterated!"

"I think your right Duo." She agreed softly

"So are any of the rumors I read true?"

Shaking her head she answered "Absolutely not" and then she lowered her voice to a whisper "He seems more offended by my presence than anything else."

Duo turned to study the man typing away and then looked back at her "If that was true I don't think he'd have taken the position." He said in the same tone.

"Well he won't be around much longer."

"What? why?"

A sly smile crept onto her pretty face "Let's just say here soon you'll be reading about a certain couples break up."

Duo raised an eyebrow "Now how are you going to mange that behind your brothers back?"

"He crossed the line with the dressing room and the bathroom…he even packed my suitcase for me!" she whispered irritated "If he's going to treat me like a child well then damn it I am going to start acting like one….a very spoiled child."

He laughed amused but not taking her seriously "I think you should just give him a chance see how it goes."

"What for? What do I owe him anyway?" she crossed her arms mildly offended.

"Listen I am not sticking up for his rude behavior…"

"It sure seems that way"

"Listen I just think you need to look at the situation a little different." He said in defense.

"I don't want to argue with you please can we talked about something else?" she asked hoping their voices were low enough and Heero distracted enough to not hear that they were talking about him.

"Alrighty then little missy, what do you want for Christmas?"

She gave an overdramatic gasp "DUO!" that got Heero's attention as he looked at the two "A week before Christmas and you have yet to get me a gift? Shame on you! I thought we were friends!" she fake sniffled

Duo shot Heero a brief hateful glare that Relena barely noticed before he turned back to her with the same cheesy apologetic grin he had before "ah come on you know how forgetful I can be…."

"I don't want anything. I am just glad I get to spend Christmas with the people I care about most." She answered truthfully.

"Come on you can tell me…what your hearts desire!" he prodded.

"Nothing that can be gift wrapped with a pretty bow on top." She said feeling a little sad and even more pathetic for allowing herself to feel that way.

Duo's face got serious and asked again "what is it?"

She sighed. There maybe nothing he could do about it but maybe she would feel better after talking to him" I want a life…"

He looked at her confused as did their traveling companion.

"I'm not fifteen anymore and I am not really sure what to do with myself. I can't exactly have a normal life right now "She briefly glared at Heero then returned her attention back to Duo "I'll never be able to start over but I don't really know where to go from here.... my personal life was put on hold for years, I'm not sure how to pick it back up."

Duo looked at her with all of the understanding in the world "I think we all know how you feel…."

"Yes." She sighed. She supposed they did.

Heero just continued to stare at her with a look of sheer confusion. She met his gaze only to quickly look away. Her confession made her feel stupid. There was no reason for her to feel that way. She had money and love of family and friends. Everything a girl could ask for. Yes she should feel stupid …it wasn't like she was like Heero and the rest of the pilots who had a dark and painful past who hands were stained with blood.

But couldn't he at least keep his judgmental glares to himself? Not like he'd paid any attention to her ramblings before so why start now?

Feeling the heat of his eyes on her she decided that her little plan might just have to start immediately……

~*~

"She seems annoyed."

"That's to be expected."

"Hn"

"Maybe instead of hiding out in the bathroom you should go out there and talk to her."

"Duo has been doing enough of that for the both of us."

"Well go ask her what she wants for Christmas."

"Knowledge has already been retrieved."

"And that would be...."

"Knowledge has been declared top secret."

"......."


	3. Chapter 3

AN: I would like to thank Vixen1, iliac310, Hououza and the one anonymousness person for reviewing!! HUGS ALL AROUND!! Gave me a warm and fuzzy feeling inside so make sure you keep em coming!!

Chapter Three: Big Comfy Chair

All her time spent on shuttles and planes compared nothing to this five our trip. She was slowly wondering if Duo even had an off button. What did this man do, power drive caffeine?

Heero's random glares didn't help her mood either.

"And I told her that if she didn't like me vacuuming the drapes then she could just do it herself…."

Relena smiled moving her stiff body up from the seat "What exactly did Hilde have to say about that?"

"Well…" he stretch his arms and gave her a sheepish look "I slept on the couch for a week."

"Serves you right!" she teased "My breaking point would have been when you vacuumed the counter tops..."

Duo just shrugged it off as his cleaning methods were perfectly normal and Heero seemed weary of the never ending five hour chatter he'd been subjected to as they exited the plan and headed toward the black limo Quatre sent for them.

Duo opened the door for her as she slipped inside followed by her two companions as the driver put their luggage in the trunk. She turned to look at the driver then pointed lazily at him "Heero go help the man." she commanded.

If it was a possibility she thought Duo's jaw might have hit the floor as Heero obeyed with out argument and exited the vehicle. She had a queasy sick feeling at giving him an order one might give a common servant but quickly shook it of as she thought of her mission objective.

"What's going on in that pretty little head of your little missy?" Duo asked quizzically.

She looked back at Heero who was putting in the last of the suitcases and appeared to be having a friendly conversation with the driver. Her frustrated eyes narrowed in determination "I've decided to completely annoy Heero to death."

"And your doing this because...."

"Bathroom stall-dressing room-tabloids-sleeps in a chair IN my room." she counted off angrily.

The braided man threw his hands up in surrender "Ok ok I get!" he started to laugh "Your going to make his life a living hell by making him pack a few suitcases in the trunk? Yup I bet he's ready to run for the hills now!"

That just earned Duo a very Heero like glare.

~*~

Her breath caught as she gazed at Quatre's winter estate, to no surprise it was just as breathtaking as the last time she'd seen it. The grand house was made up brick and wood with five stories surrounded by luscious evergreens and a thick layer a pure white untainted snow. In all its grandness it still held sort of a comfortable homey feeling, sort of like Quatre she thought. Man of absolute power and money yet everything about him was warm and inviting.

"RELENA!!"

She heard a female voice squeal from above her. Her eyes mad their way up to the third story balcony to the pixy the voice belonged to "Good to see you Hilde!" she said as they made their way up the porch.

The grand double doors flew open to reveal a very excited Quatre "Relena it's been far to long." he said pulling her into a warm embrace.

"Yeah good to see you to." Duo pouted off to the side.

Quatre immediately pulled Duo into a hug "Yes I know the past two weeks must have been torture."

Duo just rolled his eyes as he gave his friend an awkward hug in return.

Quatre's eyes drifted to the man shadowing Relena as he pulled away from his braided friend "I didn't expect to see you so soon Heero! But I am glad you came!"

So soon? What was he keeping in contact with Quatre as well? This miffed her a little bit, Duo and Wufei were part of the preventer's so maybe that she could understand but.....

"Heero would you retrieve the luggage?" She asked her voice conveying a little more annoyance than she wanted it to.

"Hn" was his only response as he headed back down the steps.

Duo tried to cover up a laugh and Quatre just looked confused "What was that about Relena?"

"Heero is the newest addition to my seemingly voluntary guard."

The blond man seemed to think a moment before he spoke "I thought maybe....i guess that means....then what I read isn't true?"

"No." Said both Relena and Duo at the same time.

"But he does sleep in a chair in her room so thats a start!" Duo added "So I hope you got some really comfy ones cuz Heero should feel like he's on vacation."

Quatre covered his mouth and gave a rather pathetic attempt at a cough trying to disguise his laugh as Heero reentered with a few suitcases only to proceed back out the door to finish his mission.

Small arms encircled Relena from behind "Guess who!" said a female voice trying to sound low and throaty and manly as possible.

"Your just as bad as Duo" she teased.

Hilde skipped around her to plant a kiss on her boyfriends lips "I've missed you."

Duo just blushed and threw his arm around her "Me to babe."

Heero returned with the last of the suitcases and turned to Relena "Anything else?"

"I need mine brought to my room." She said trying to sound like a spoiled little girl who needed to have everything done for her. Truly it felt absurd and she felt Hilde's questioning eyes on her.

"Well let me show you all to your room then." Their host said leading them up grand stairs to the second floor "Duo, Hilde will show you where the two of you will be sleeping And Heero and Relena will have rooms next to each other."

Duo winked at Quatre as Hilde dragged him up to the third floor "How accommodating!"

Quatre opened the first door to the right "Same room as last time Relena I hope thats alright?"

"Of course it is." she said stepping into the cream colored room with the canopy bed and balcony that suited her so well. "You remembered how much I liked it, thats very sweet."

Quatre's cheeks turned a little pink "Thank you." he turned to look at Heero standing at the door still holding two suitcases "Your room is just the next one over."

Heero nodded politely setting her suitcase inside the room.

"Outta the way buddy your bed is coming through!"

Heero stumbled to the side along with Quatre as a large red very cushioned chair was being pushed into the room and was set up against the wall by an out of breath Duo.

"Um well then..." said Quatre feeling like maybe this wasn't the best time for any of the question's swimming through his mind to be asked "Everyone else is in town doing some last minute Christmas shopping but they'll be back in time for supper so I'll just leave you guys to unpack." the confused blond haired blue eyed man swiftly left the room a little in fear for Duo's life. But Heero said he would never kill again right? Right.

Duo plopped his but down into the very comfy looking chair and squirmed in for a moment before he proceeded to bounce up and down in it.

"What exactly do you think your doing?" Heero asked expressionless with a small hint of annoyance to his voice.

"Just breaking it in for ya..." he continued to bounce "No one likes a new mattress!"

She supposed had she been an outsider to this little scene it might have been amusing however the chair was not staying "There are five former Gundam pilots in this house I don't think Heero is going to find it necessary to sleep in my room."

Heero nodded in agreement as he reached forward and grabbed Duo from the chair dragging him from the room.

"What did I do?"

Heero returned shortly picking up his suitcase from the doorway only for his actions to be interrupted by the girl standing in the room with folded arms.

"You took the liberty of packing my things I think it's only right you unpack them." she said expectantly.

Unfortunately her request didn't seem to phase him as he entered then room and sat the suitcase softly onto the bed. Hoping his unpacking would be as quick as the packing process had been she turned her attention the the familiar book shelf and made her way toward it. Her fingers grazed the familiar book titles and stopped at one as a genuine smile lit up her face and pulled a large gold covered book from it's place. It was a collection of timeless fairy tales. The last time she was here she briefly skimmed though it enjoying it's elaborate art work but found that when even when on vacation no one had time to read with Duo around.

"Where do you want me to put this?" Heero asked gruffly.

"Hmm?" she questioned returning the book to its home and turning around.

Her heart skipped a beat and her stomach tightened with what felt like a mixture of embarrassment and shock to what the perfect soldier now held in his possession.

It was brown. It was Furry. It was rather worn from years of being held during all her lonely nights.

Oh and it defiantly wasn't in the drawer of her night stand she'd shoved it into out of embarrassment three weeks ago.

Mentally to no avail she tried to subdue the heat rising to her cheeks "Wherever" she said softly.

"Is there anything else?" he asked arms folded eyes focused as if he was expecting another chore.

"No...you are" a brief hesitation before she finished her sentence "Dismissed."

~*~

"I was dismissed."

"You were what?"

"Not repeating command."

"God, what did you do?"

"I packed her teddy bear."

"You personally packed her teddy bear?"

"Correct."

"You are.....just a....complete and utter......dumb ass."

"Hn?"


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Sorry it took so long to get this chapter out I just changed shifts at work and I am completely exhausted-which means this chapter sucks, sorry guys but my brain is mush! I will try and make up for it in the next chapter, promise!!

Oh and thanks for the reviews!! They really make my day!!

In response to a review-I have to do all my writing at work (hehe I am so bad!) and I don't have anyone to check my writing for me- I do the best I can but my fingers just seem to do what they will-sorry about all the mistakes.

Also to clear up some confusion, with the exception of the beginning of chapter two where Heero is talking to Duo he is speaking to Millardo the rest of the time. I will try and make that clear from now on.

Chapter Four: Bedtime Stories

She wasn't sure what it was supposed to be, it appeared to have something resembling pine needles. What were the yellow and purple balls dangling from this foreign object? And why was it sitting in the exact spot a beautiful evergreen had stood the previous year?

"What is this hideous thing?" Duo asked standing next to Relena seeming somewhat weary about approaching the object too closely; stepping slowly toward the fireplace he grabbed the nearest poker "it must be destroyed."

Heero stood at the doorway behind the two observing the crisis "What's wrong?"

A forlorn Duo was too mesmerized by the disaster to answer his friend and Relena reluctantly explained the situation "I am not sure but I think this is supposed to be Quatre's Christmas tree."

Duo shoved the poker into the objects middle and a few of the purple and yellow balls fell to the floor and shattered "it can be destroyed!" he said gleefully.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY TREE DUO?" Said Quatre horrified as he ran to Duo's side grapping the poker from him.

"Do not tell me that THING is supposed to be a tree!"

Even Heero looked confused as he stood next to Relena staring at the large white plastic thing with branches adorned with yellow and purple glass balls and silver garland; it was by far the tackiest thing she'd ever seen.

"What were you thinking?" Relena asked

"It was Dorothy's idea." The blond man confessed "she wanted to try something new this year."

"It's simply awful." Said Relena "the tree was so beautiful last year"

"Where did she pick this thing up, the flee market in Florida?"

~*~

"The tree is not coming down so stop harassing me Duo!" said Dorothy angrily defending her tree.

"This place is surrounded by evergreens and you import a tacky ass white tree from your grandmother?"

The entire table groaned as the argument continued Relena observed the group as they finished their dinner. They had returned to find Dorothy chasing Duo away from the tree with the retrieved poker and Quatre and Relena trying to talk some sense into the pair. The fight ended briefly when Wufei dragged Duo out the room by his braid spewing a lecture about the sheer humiliation of allowing a week woman to dominate any situation.

Hildie poked her from the other side "so how did Heero like his chair?" she giggled quietly.

"He has his own room but I plan on making him get some use of it tonight" she whispered back.

"What do you mean?"

"Lets see how it goes and I will tell you in the morning" said Relena not noticing Heero was watching her from the other side of the table.

"Hey girlies want to let us in on the secret?" asked Duo

"Duo mind your own business!" said Hildie glaring "Finish your food so we can have dessert, if you wouldn't have been so busy complaining this entire time you would have finished by now."

"Well if brows over there would just take down that monstrosity we would not be having this conversation"

Relena smiled to herself as she watched the couple argue. Quatre was at the end of the table between Dorothy and Trowa using all his energy to console his girlfriends hurt feelings. Trowa of course sat silently picking at his food while his sister Catherine chatted away.

"Woman, why must you pick at my food when you made your own plate?" Wufei grumbled

"My plate wasn't big enough" Sally answered.

"You could have gone back to the kitchen, are you really that lazy?"

"Yes."

"Would you like me to go and get you another plate?" Wufei asked trying his best to calm himself despite the unjustifiable situation.

"No." Sally answered simply.

"Why? You seem to still be hungry."

"Your plate is still full" She smiled.

"Hey Relena" Catherine called from the other side of the table "Do you have all your Christmas shopping finished?"

"Yes…" she sighed remembering how frustrating it had been to shop when they all had to be cleared before she entered them "Pagan is shipping them here for me."

"Oh" Catherine said disappointed "I was really hoping I could find a good excuse to go out again."

"If you want to go I will be more than willing to accompany you" Relena volunteered.

"No" came a dull voice across from her.

"You're not the boss of me Heero if I want to go shopping I can" she said hatefully.

"If you go then I have to accompany you."

"Good then I will have someone to hold my bags" she sneered.

"Hn then it's a date."

"A date?" the entire table whispered together.

Noting the confusion Heero answered their silent questions "at least that's what the next day's paper will proclaim."

Relena's cheeks grew red as she tightened her grip on her fork glaring at nothing in particular. He was right, he won, damn.

Quatre was the first to break the silence "is it ok if we have dessert in the living room? I gave the staff the week off except for the cook so I am going to have to clean up and serve myself."

Glad to have a reason to leave she grabbed her plate and glass and made her way toward the kitchen "that will be just fine Quatre and I will be more than happy to help."

~*~

"Our source tell us that Relena Peacecraft, former Queen of the world, former Vice Foreign Minister is on a romantic Christmas get away with her bodyguard boyfriend" said the over zealous bottle blond woman with to much make up as she stared wide eyed into the camera.

"The question for today is- what will he get her for Christmas? Get online now and tell us what you think!" the camera shot over to a tan man with a comb over and to many botox injections, a cheesy grin plastered on his face.

"My source told me she received a teddy bear from him one year on her birthday."

"Well maybe the little princess has a diamond in her future…."

Relena cringed inwardly as a red faced Quatre pressed the off button "I'm sorry."

"Its ok" she said sincerely "it's still much better than those awful tabloid articles."

"But it makes me wonder…" Duo stood up bringing his fingers thoughtfully to his chin "who is this source they keep talking about?"

"It's probably you" Dorothy teased "You're such an instigator."

"Can it roach, this could be an inside job."

"It's probably all made up, the show is known to be packed full of lies anyway." said Trowa placing a comforting hand on Relena's shoulder.

She looked around the room, all females eyes looked at her ready to attack, she their prey and target of new and amusing gossip.

"I still say a mole has infiltrated our pack…" his eyes scanned his friends accusingly "more than likely it's one of the females…such gossips!"

"Hey" gasped Catherine "you're worse than all of us put together."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

"Stop this ridiculous bickering immediately" said Wufei as he moved toward the door and gave Relena a fleeting glance that did not unnoticed by Heero "come on woman, its time to turn in."

"Yes sir!"

~*~

Relena stole a glance at Heero as they walked silently up the staircase noting he'd been silent almost the entire night even through the media conversation, wondering by he didn't even feel the need to defend himself. Maybe it was because the idea of them being together was too absurd in his mind for anyone that knew him to think it was at all a possibility.

A familiar ach rose in her chest as they continued on, she wasn't supposed to be feeling this way. She was supposed to stop caring a long time ago. How could she allow this situation to carry on if she allowed her unrequited feelings to come back to life, what if they never really left? It would be too painful if he stayed around.

She stopped him as soon as they reached her door "Heero would you come in for a moment?"

"You're asking?"

"I suppose" she sighed "I am away from home so I need help getting to sleep."

Her stared her down for a moment in thought before he answered "how can I be of service?"

"Move the chair to the side of the bed…" she almost added please but then decided against it.

He obeyed and turned to stare at her.

"I'll be just a minute" grabbing her pajamas she headed toward the bathroom taking no time to change. Staring at the door she giggled to herself, would he really do this for her?

Heero was still standing by the chair when she reentered the room "Sit."

She grabbed the large book from its place and brought it to where he was sitting saying nothing as she handed it to him and slipped in beneath the covers.

He scanned the cover of the book before giving her a confused expression.

"You can start from the beginning."

"When do I stop?"

"When I fall asleep" she cooed.

He swallowed hard before turning to the first page "Once upon a time in a far away land…." he read monotone.

Looking at him a wave of guilt spread over her, where had the cold heartless soldier gone? Where was the man that was absent from her life for so long?

"An evil curse was set upon the fair young maiden…" he continued on.

Maybe this was the wrong approach. What good did it do her if she asked him to do things that made her feel this way?

"The evil princess reigned with terror and made her subjects do menial labor and her army read fairy tales till the end of their days, the end."

"That's not the story" she scowled.

"You weren't even listening."

"Yes I was."

"What story was I reading?"

"The first one."

~*~

"Oh Charlie I knew you'd come…"

"Lisa I have something to tell you…"

"What is it Charlie my love?"

"I am…"

"You are?"

"Your brother…."

"NOOOOOOOOOO"

"Pay up" Relena giggled as she held out her hand to Wufei "I so told you."

"This isn't right, they slept together- there is no way it should have turned out like this" he scowled digging in his pocket for what was owed.

~*~

((Zechs and Heero))

"What's the mission status?"

"Complicated."

"Meaning...."

"Its 3 am and she is currently locked in a room with Wufei without the knowledge of his mate."

"I think you should infiltrate their meeting."

"hn?"

"she might let you in on what she is up to..."

"I am not the type of person that shares."

"She let me, even Noin once."

"......"

"What?"


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Thanks for reading and thanks for the reviews!! Sorry about the last chapter. I thought I would sort of give Relena's point of view a break for awhile..... **

**Chapter Five: Such A Pretty Pretty Princess **

**The traitorous light hit her eyes as a soft hand slid the warm blanket down off her face, who was this person disturbing her slumber? She squeezed her eyes shut and the hand reached out to gently move the tangled hair away from her face.**

**"****Wake up Relena" said a feminine voice from above her.**

**She felt the added weight to her bed as more bodies seemed to occupy it "yeah wake up sleepy head; it's ten in the morning." **

** "****Give her a minute she had a late night…." a voce giggled. **

**Slowly opening her eyes they met with four amused female ones and instantly she knew this was the surprise attack she'd known was coming. **

**"****Late night?" asked Hildie **

**"****So are you making the rumors true Relena?" Dorothy said jokingly as she lightly threw a pillow in her direction.**

**Yawning as she sat up she threw her friend an annoyed glare "don't you think it's a little early for an interrogation?" **

**"****It's ten" Catherine mused "we've been waiting on you forever."**

**The battle would be lost to her, it was four against one "I don't know what you want to know" she lied. **

**"****Oh bullshit Peacecraft, dish." Sally looked at her with stern eyes obviously wanting ever single detail no matter how boring in Relena's mind they might be "Let's start at the beginning, how did Heero come to work for you?" **

**"****I don't know" she answered honestly "I woke up one morning and there he was, Millardo told me later that he'd found him and asked because he thought I needed more protection for the time being." **

**"****That's strange…" Hildie seemed to think out loud "Heero told Duo that he was planning on leaving the preventer's…"**

**"****Exactly what he told Quatre" Dorothy agreed. **

**"****Whoa" Relena said stopping their conversation "you mean he's been in contact with all of you?" **

**Four females nodded their answer guiltily. **

**"****So Heero Yuy has kept in contact with everyone but me?" Relena said, hurt evident in her voice. **

**"****You mean he hasn't been to see you?" asked Sally confused. **

**"****No." **

**"****You never told us that, after all this time Relena?" **

**She shrugged trying to brush off the jealousy she felt "I knew Duo talked to him from time to time but I never knew he'd been in contact with all of you." **

**"****We didn't know he never came to see you." Dorothy said softly "I just always assumed…" **

**"****When was the last time you saw him?" asked Catherine.**

**"****Three years ago…" Relena choked fighting back tears she didn't want anyone to see "before ****he left the hospital." **

**Hildie folded her arms in frustration "That doesn't make any sense."**

**"****It makes perfect sense to me" Relena said staring down at her hands not wanting her friends to read what she was feeling in her eyes "I never really was his favorite person." **

**"****I can't believe we never thought to ask…." **

**~*~**

**Noin looked over at her husband as he gazed out the window of their shuttle as it landed "are you still worried?"**

**"I'm still wondering if I made the right decision" he said solemnly**

**She placed a reassuring hand over his "do you doubt their feelings?"**

**"No, just their ability on knowing how to act on them" he said doubtfully. **

**Noin knew he was right; this was a risky game he decided to play. Toying with the emotions of others especially the one person he cared the most about save for herself, could end up very badly for all involved. However she knew he was tired of seeing his sister lonely and so obviously unhappy, thinking that maybe it was her former position of Vice Foreign that was taking it toll on her, was saddened when after stepping down she still held a glimmer loneliness in her eyes. **

**Shocked as she was when her beloved informed her he was going in search for his former enemy, she couldn't help but feel pleased. Relena hadn't dated a single person in three years even after stepping down. Much to Millardo's dismay they knew the reason why, Heero Yuy was the only person who could ever hold his sister heart, not that she was willing to admit it. When he seldom did come into conversation her feelings were very evident in her eyes. **

**"What do you mean?" his wife asked.**

**"Heero, for obvious reasons, has trouble expressing his emotions. Relena however has never had a boyfriend and I think Heero is the first person she's ever had romantic feelings for." he said thoughtfully. **

**"Are you even sure Heero has feeling for her?" she asked doubtfully but hopefully at the same time "you never told me." **

**"I'm not sure...."**

**It surprised him how the other four Gundam pilots, who during the war would have given their lives to protect their mission and any detail involving it, would be such gossips. It hadn't been hard to retrieve information about Heero in the beginning as he was constantly in and out of his former comrades lives. Apparently he'd been in contact with everyone but Relena and himself. During his visits he inquired about Relena's personal life, quite frequently if his information was correct. Duo leaked that under the command of Une that he attended every political event Relena attended, as silent protection. Unfortunately he didn't get this particular information until Relena had already resigned and wasn't sure where to start looking and had stopped for a brief period until her last kidnapping attempt. The same night of the incident Relena accompanied Une to an Opera and he had the distinct feeling his search was over. **

**He'd found Heero lurking in an abandoned balcony, eyes locked and so focused on his sister he didn't even sense him approach. Surprised at how easy it was to talk the former pilot into the job he couldn't complain, it seemed like it was an easy in for the young boy. **

**During their brief conversation he tried to make Heero vaguely aware of what he was really asking without scaring him off, he seemed in some sense to understand. The random phone calls of updates or for advice raised his hopes, though it didn't seem like he was helping himself progress in any way. The guy really was clueless. **

**"....it's just a gut feeling."**

**~*~ **

**Quatre dwarfed in size compared to much taller man he was now bravely embracing in a friendly hug "I'm so glad you guys could make it this year!" **

**Uncomfortable he just patted the young man on the back "uh, yeah."**

**Noin smirked as Quatre's attentions moved toward his wife and she eagerly hugged her dear friend in return "it was such a long flight, I'm exhausted."**

**"Well here let me take your bag and I'll show you where the two of you will be sleeping" said ****Quatre as he gingerly grabbed her suitcase from her grasp "this way" he said leading Noin up the stairs.**

**"I'm going to find Relena." Millardo said to the two.**

**"They are in the living room, I think." Quatre volunteered. **

**"Thanks." Millardo made is way down the hall into the living room where most everyone occupied when his eyes immediately darted to the disturbing, thing, in the corner "What is that?" **

**"Dorothy" Duo said seemingly fatigued by the thing. **

**Millardo smirked "I always wondered what she looked liked outside of her human form..."**

**"HEY" a small but pointed finger jabbed him hard in the ribs "I'm right here, Zech's."**

**He couldn't help but smile at her "it's nice to see you Dorothy."**

**"Humph."**

**His eyes scanned the room for his sister but only met with Heero's, he made his way over to the corner of the room where he stood looking somewhat disturbed "where is my sister?" **

**Heero's brow furrowed as he answered "locked in a room with Wufei" his blue eyes narrowed "he said Relena seemed agitated so he was going to help her meditate, I however have the distinct impression they are not, meditating."**

**Oh Heero, he thought "follow me."**

**~*~ **

**"****I don't like this" Duo sighed "Relena's hasn't been herself since she got here."**

**Trowa put down the newspaper he was reading "I've noticed that" he agreed.**

**"****You think it has something to do with Heero?" asked Quatre.**

**"****Obviously" Duo sneered "she wasn't exactly thrilled when she read the tabloids."**

**"****I was shocked when I first learned Heero had volunteered but I assumed she would have been happy about it" said Trowa.**

**"****Why is that?" asked Duo.**

**"****I thought, maybe I'm wrong, that she had feelings for him." Trowa answered hesitantly. **

**"****She did follow him around during the war" stated Quatre "but she never actually said anything to me." **

**"****She never brought him up to me" said Duo sternly "but, I guess she always did look overly curious when I talked about him." **

**Trowa looked thoughtful for a moment before he spoke "do you think he has feelings for her?" **

**Duo gave an amused grin "well yeah, he asked about her constantly and I think we all know he was practically stalking her."**

**"****That Heero, he can be such a romantic" Quatre laughed. **

**"****Maybe we should give our friends a little push in the right direction?" Trowa asked, eyes darting between his friends. **

**Quatre thought for a second before his lit up "they both do seem lonely, what could it hurt?"**

**"****We could all end up staring down the barrel of Heero's gun" Duo stated a little dumbfounded at the idea. **

**"****Heero is our friend" Quatre softly "he deserves like the rest of us to, be happy." **

**"****I agree" said Trowa.**

**"****Uh it's a completely moo point if Relena doesn't feel the same way, we assume, Heero does" shot Duo. **

**From the other side of the room a very long eyebrow shot up, she'd been pretending like the other women that she wasn't listening to the men's conversation "moo point, duo?" the other four women looked at Duo just as quizzically as Dorothy "Don't you mean moot?" **

**Duo just glared at her if she was the biggest idiot on earth "No brows I meant moo, you know, ****it's like a cow's opinion. It just doesn't matter. It's moo." **

**"****Duo…" said Dorothy "you have to stop the Q-tip when there's resistance." **

**~*~ **

**"****Before we go in" said Millardo quietly a few feet away from Quatre's office "you want to give me an update?" **

**Heero's eyes were locked on the door but still answered "she asked me to read her a bedtime story last night."**

**"****Did you?" he asked. **

**"****Of course" he looked up at the man "she asked." **

**They approached the door and he noticed Heero seemed very hesitant to enter, he stopped and leaned into the door to hear what was going on, on the other side and amused Millardo decided to do the same. **

**"****Wufei….we could get caught."**

**"****So what if we do, I am tired of loosing sleep because we are hiding this."**

**"****Do you have any idea what Sally would do to you if she ever found out?"**

**"****I am willing to deal with the consequences, I can handle that woman." **

**"****Wufei you are so bad…."**

**Millardo gave a hearty laughed as he saw Heero's jaw tighten and his posture went rigid. He ****knocked on the door knowing they'd heard him laugh. **

**His sister poked her head out the door and looked relieved when she saw her brother "oh it's just you" but then she noticed Heero's presence and her cheeks turned a deep crimson.**

**"****Who's there?" asked Wufei from the couch. **

**"****Millardo…" she glared at Heero "and Heero." **

**Wufei glared at the two men as they walked in "Zech's, you know that if you come, you come alone." **

**"****Chang, it's about to start, Heero have a seat." Millardo motioned for him to sit on the couch next to Relena. **

**One Hour Later……….**

**"****I don't care that you're my brother Charlie, I love you and I always will…" **

**"****Oh god, Lisa,****if it were only that!"**

**"****What's wrong my love?"**

**"****Not only am I your brother Lisa…"**

**"****What is it Charlie?"**

**"…****.I am also, your uncle." **

**"****Noooooooo!" **

**Wufei's fist slammed hard against the coffee table before them "IT CAN BE, HOW CAN HE BE HER BROTHER AN UNCLE AT THE SAME DAMN TIME?" **

**Relena had a goofy smiled plastered all over her face and Heero seemed a little disgusted. Millardo chuckled inwardly, if history repeated its self......**

**Thirty Minutes Later......**

**Millardo got a queasy feeling in his stomach as he turned the spinner. He didn't really think his sister would make him and Heero participate in Wufei's humiliation, but the former pilot and himself agreed, reluctantly. After all, you did need four. **

**But, he would be damned if the Chinese man beat him, again. There they were all four of them around the coffee table waiting patiently for the arrow to stop spinning.**

**"You've been beaten again Zech's" sneered Wufei triumphantly as the arrow landed on the black ring. **

**"I'm sorry Millardo, better luck next time" Relena tried to comfort her brother as he returned all his peaces to the case. **

**Now it was Relena's turned a bright smile lit her face as the arrow landed on a purple earring, the last missing piece in her set. **

**Millardo and Wufei's bodies tensed as Heero took his turn. He was the only one with the complete set and his arrow needed to land on only one spot to win. He doubted heero would be that lucky as of yet seeing as Relena continually landed on that spot to no avail because until now she had not accumulated all of her items. **

**Distracted by his thoughts he noticed his sister face looked crestfallen "Not again." **

**Wufei held an amused smirk on his face as her grabbed Heero's winning piece. **

**"I am not putting that on" Heero said monotone. **

**"Then you forfeit, weakling."**

**"You have to put it on Heero, if you want to win the game" argued Millardo.**

**Heero glanced over at Relena's disappointed face before hesitantly picking up the fake diamond encrusted crown and placing it onto the top of his head. **

**"Heero Yuy.." started Wufei "You are, the pretty pretty Princess." they all stared at Heero in all his glory, pink earrings, necklace, ring and bracelet. **

**Relena tried to hide the smile on her face "beaten again, the irony." **


	6. Chapter 6

An: I am thinking about changing the title of this story, yes the tabloids will continue to play out in future chapters..but I just don't think its fitting anymore. I cant come up with anything at the moment but I would love to hear any suggestions from you guys out there! HELP PLEASE!!

Hououza: Thanks so much for all your reviews, I really look forward to them! Haha I am glad you noticed the friends quote...one of my all time faves!! And yes it does make Relena the knight in some sense, not necessarily in this story but in general I think Relena, if they had continued the series would have been the one to save him from himself.

Velaris: Thanks so much for the review I am glad you liked what Zechs said about Dorothy. I went to my parents one year for Christmas and instead of having the beautiful traditional Christmas tree they'd always had they decided to go with the tree I described in my story...i was mortified and as you can tell I have not gotten over it lol

Anonymous(99): I think everyone wishes more people reviewed to their stories, I know I do. But I am happy with what I have, people seem to enjoy this. Even if I only ever get one more review until the story is finished I will be happy knowing at least one person likes it.

Chapter Six: One For The Team

Of course she assumed Heero and Relena stayed in contact, before Relena stepped down Heero always commented on her speeches saying he'd been there on duty. When he asked about her, once again she assumed it because maybe he hadn't talked to her in awhile. Relena never did express to her any feelings for Heero and she never thought to ask, but if they rest of them were right and she did have feelings for Heero, and he was gone for three years…

"Are you ok babe? You look upset" Duo said sitting next to her, looking concerned.

"I'm just thinking, about what you guys were talking about earlier" she confessed.

He gave her a guilty grin "oh, so you heard everything?"

She nodded "Relena found out today that Heero wasn't as gone as she thought he was."

"Well" he sighed "I didn't want to hurt her feeling."

"Is that why you never told her he came to visit us all the time?" she asked accusingly.

"It's not like you said anything either" he argued "Heero is a private person; I was trying to respect that."

"Yes, and him following her around anytime she set foot outside of her house for three years was in no way an invasion of her privacy" she said sarcastically "until this morning, I never even thought about Heero and Relena, it honestly never occurred to me."

"That's right" he seemed to realize "you didn't really know them during the war."

"Well there is one thing I know" she said seriously "her feelings are hurt, I think she was about to cry."

"That can only mean one thing" his face lit up "she must have feelings for him!"

"You want to know what I think." Dorothy cut in.

Duo sighed heavily at the blond woman who sat across from them "and what's that brows?"

"I think" she said staring them down "that instead of sitting here assuming things and making plans for people behind their backs, a lot of this speculation could be cleared up if both of you would just ask said individuals how they feel."

"Well good thing I didn't ask" Duo spat.

Hilde jabbed him hard in the ribs "Dorothy is right, I'll ask Relena if you ask Heero."

"Yeah that'll go over well; hey Heero how's the weather? Oh by the way, are you secretly in love with Relena?" he scoffed.

Dorothy raised an eyebrow "it's so simple, it could work."

~*~

Wufei's arm stretched out in front of the group to block their exit as he glared at each of them "what happened in this room, stays in this room."

Heero nodded, he had the most to be embarrassed about and Millardo smiled "it always does Wufei."

She couldn't take her eyes away from the middle of Heero's back as they made their way toward the living room. Her mission was failing; she wasn't very good at this. So far he'd agreed to read her a bedtime story and dress up as a princess without so much as a word. What was her plan again, oh right, to annoy him so much he'd quit. Why again was she doing this, right, because he was a cold heartless bastard that hated her and wouldn't let her pee in a public restroom by herself.

Not to mention not hearing a word from him in three years to find out he'd been having a good o time with all her friends.

"Bitter much Relena?" she mumbled quietly to herself.

Heero abruptly stopped causing her to run into his back "sorry" she whispered "I wasn't paying attention" rubbing her nose she noted how good he smelled, maybe it wouldn't hurt to run into him more often.

He turned to face her as Wufei and her brother left them alone on the staircase "what did you say?"

"I said I was sorry I wasn't paying attention" she thought he'd had better hearing than that.

"No" he shook his head "before that."

"It was nothing" she sighed trying to make her way past him "I was thinking out loud."

"Did I do something?" he asked sincerely, eyes showing the first hint of any emotion toward her since they were on Libra over four years ago.

She opened her mouth to say the first rude thing that came to her mind but quickly shut it when she realized he was making an attempt toward a conversation. This wasn't like him, why now?

He cocked his head to the side waiting for her response, eyes focused, trying to get her to meet his penetrating gaze.

"You mean other than making my life difficult?" she didn't mean to sound rude and even though it was the truth she felt guilty, it really wasn't his fault, immediately wishing she could take the words back.

She saw a flicker of something in his gaze and suddenly had the overwhelming urge to reach out to him, she retreated that line of thinking when his expression slipped back into the stone cold unemotional mask of the perfect soldier she was so familiar with "I can't help it if people take pictures you Relena" he said defending himself.

"They weren't taking pictures of me Heero, they were taking pictures of us" she said softly.

"Us" he said very low, loosing eye contact with her.

"Hey there you guys are" Said Duo at the bottom of the steps "can I borrow Heero for a minute Relena?"

She nodded reluctantly, feeling a little undone.

~*~

"I don't know if this is such a good idea Trowa, remember what happened last year?" said Quatre meekly as he sat next to Trowa in the Limo.

"Last time I checked Duo's braid was still in tact" Trowa responded confidently.

"You don't think…" he looked at his friend with wide eyes "...they'll be mad at us, do you?"

Trowa shook his head "this is just a back up plan Quatre, in case when confronted by Hilde and Duo they aren't forthcoming with the required information."

Quatre sunk down in his seat "how much do you think we are going to need?"

The former circus performer rubbed his temples in thought before he answered "approximately 56 bundles."

Quatre's eyes went wide with worry "why so many?"

"You have a big house" Trowa sighed "a lot of doorways."

"God Trowa, I don't-I don't want Duo to kiss me!"

"Just keep a pair of scissors in your hands at all times and I think you'll be ok" said Trowa with a hint of laughter in his voice, not knowing how literally that statement was going to be taken.

~*~

"You want anything to drink?" asked Duo as he pulled out a bottle of water from the fridge.

"No"

"Can I ask you a question?" Duo asked cautiously.

"Hn"

This wasn't going to be easy, nothing with Heero was easy "how's the weather?" well at least that's a start.

"Cold."

"That's good" he started, deciding to test the waters "I never thought to ask before, have you been seeing anyone lately?"

"I see people every day."

"No" defiantly not easy "I mean have you been dating anyone?"

"Why?"

"Because we're friends that's why" his laugh was shaky.

"Hn"

Duo narrowed his eyes at Heero in determination "do you like Relena?"

"Everybody likes Relena."

Duo's face fell into his hands "not what I meant Yuy" he grumbled.

Heero smirked "I can't believe this is the first time you've asked."

"What…" Duo's voice slightly muffled by his hands "…so you do?"

Heero just kept the smirk on his face as he grabbed Duo's water and walked out of the kitchen.

"Hey that's mine!"

~*~

Hilde found Relena sitting alone on the steps when she approached "what are you doing sitting there all by yourself?" the small girl asked.

Relena looked at her then leaned in to see around the corner before she spoke "just thinking" she answer honestly.

"You're still upset about this morning" Hilde stated more than questioned.

Relena nodded "yes, not that I have any right to be."

"What do you mean?" she inquired.

She wasn't sure how to answer that, Heero had promised to always protect her, not be a part of her life. During the war he'd been the one single person she had drawn all her strength from, why she continued on. He was the reason she took her fathers position, to set up and lay down the fountain for total and complete pacifism, so he wouldn't have to fight anymore. So Heero Yuy could have a normal life, she just didn't think it would completely exclude herself personally. No, she didn't have the right to be upset with him; he had done nothing to wrong her. True, he had been a bit of an inconvenience concerning the tabloid issue but other than that he was completely innocent. It made her sick to think that the minute she took her of her business suit she regressed back into the spoiled selfish rich girl she'd been before the war. There was no reason for this pettiness or than….

A hand waved in front of her face "Relena?"

"Oh, sorry" she looked at her friend apologetically "what did you say?"

"That doesn't matter" Hilde sighed "can I ask you a personal question, between us?"

Relena looked at her suspiciously "I suppose."

Hilde just decided to blunt about it, it's not like Relena was the one with the gun "do _like_ Heero?"

Did she still after all this time have feelings for Heero Yuy? The perfect soldier, Former Gundam pilot, war Heero, savior of earth, the man with piercing blue eyes that seem to penetrate her soul, the one person who could just say her name and it sent shivers down her spine. The only man she laid awake at nights worrying about, the only man who ever mad her cry. The only man who ever ignored her, the only man who saved her life, the only man to point a gun to her head and threaten to kill her. The young boy she followed around earth and space so she could just be near him because just his presence comforted her after the tragic death of her father.

"No Hilde, I don't _like _Heero" she said slowly "I _love_ him."

~*~

Millardo wearily rubbed his temples, trying to ease his headache. He wanted to go find his sister and make sure she was alright, but Catherine hadn't stopped talking in the last twenty five minutes…

"And then this one time, at band camp-"

Quatre and Trowa returned from their secret excursion with smiles on their faces and a large brown potato sack bag.

'Whats in the bag?" asked Sally curiously.

Quatre's cheeks went red as he glanced in the general direction of Heero "you'll find out later."

Wufei's eyes narrowed suspiciously "I thought we agreed to do away with that silly tradition."

Trowa tried to make an inconspicuous show of darting his eyes to Heero and then upstairs while making some sort of kissy face on his stoic features, Quatre however was feverishly batting his eyelashes and twitching at the same time.

"Oh no-" Catherine panicked "I think Quatre is having a seizure!"

"Are you trying to wink again Quatre?" asked Dorothy disappointed "we've been over this darling, you just cant do it."

Quatre blushed and Trowa sat down defeated still holding the bag close to him "never mind" he said fiercely.

Heero glared at the pair for a moment before turning to Millardo "I've got a phone call to make to Une, then I will need to speak with you later."

Millardo nodded as the perfect solider excited the room "whats in the bag?"

"Its a whole lot of-" started Trowa but was cut off my by the blond man standing next to him, arm fully extended in Duo's direction, gripping a pair of long sliver scissors.

Quatre glared a Duo fiercely "any funny business Maxwell, and the braid is history."

"What?" asked Duo.

"Same goes for me" growled Wufei "I wont be as lenient this year."

Realization hit Duo as he looked at the bag, looked at Wufei then stared at the scissors and Quatre's terrified but warning face "IT WAS A JOKE YOU GUYS!"

~*~

"Its bad press Yuy" said Une angrily through the video phone "Its making the department look bad and if it goes any farther you'll be sent to internal affairs."

"I can guarantee you, after new years this will no longer be a problem" Heero promised monotone.

She relaxed a little "how is that?"

He looked at her with no emotion "consider this my two weeks notice."

"WHAT" she half yelled "you cant be serious Yuy?"

He just nodded, saying nothing.

"Listen" she took off her glasses and leaned in "this job was voluntary, I can reassign you."

He shook his head in protest "this has been a long time coming."

"I guess its not true then" she sighed "what everyone has been saying?"

"Hn." he glared at the screen, neither confirming or denying.

Her eyes softened and she gave him a genuine smile "I guess this job does take up a lot of our time."

He nodded in agreement.

"Merry Christmas Heero" she said softly before the screen went black.

~*~

Noin just stood there for minutes at the doorway with Relena and Hilde at each side of her. Minutes passed before she pended her mouth "what?"

Millardo came to join her and kissed her softly on the cheek "One- thats a Christmas tree, not Dorothy..."

Dorothy glared and Duo pointed and laughed, then received a mouthful of mistletoe.

"Two-" he smirked at Duo choking on the floor "we are hanging mistletoe, a lot of mistletoe."

"Well" she sighed "lets get to it then."

Heero returned just as Relena grabbed the first bundle "where should I start?" she asked.

Trowa walked over passing Heero and a wicked grin reached his face "let me help you."

Relena smiled her thanks as the insanely tall man reached over her head to hang it above them on the door frame "interesting..." he said slyly then looked over at Heero and made eye contact.

"Whats wrong?" asked Relena a little confused, noticing Heero stare her friend down.

His attentions immediately went back to the girl next to him and groaned inwardly, yes, Trowa Barton the only single man in the room, was going to take one for the team "we are under the mistletoe" before Relena had anytime to react he swiftly pulled her into a passionate kiss.

When he was finished he saw Relena starting wide eyed up at him with shock , Quatre and Millardo looked grave and Duo started clapping "way to go man, woot woot!"

He turned to look in Heero's direction to judge his reaction but the man was nowhere to be found.

"NO" Relena yelled looking behind him, not at him, curiously he turned and-

_'CRUNCH'_

Fist met face.


	7. Mr UPS Man

AN: originally I hadn't planned on writing this chapter for a few more days, but I got more reviews for the last chapter than I thought I would so it gave me some motivation!! There was begging and I can't resist begging!! I'm so easy....

Also, um sorry!! I don't know where this chapter exactly came from. I am on late shift now and its Friday night...I normally go out to the bar with friends on Fridays and I am extremely pissed about my night outs being taken away. Going through withdraws so I have turned to mass amounts of caffeine...thats how this chapter was born.

agapeNuria: Thanks so much for reviewing!! No, I don't know what in the world I am going to do with Trowa; I decided to make him more mischievous than most people make him ***sigh*** now he's a handful LOL!!

Hououza: Once again, thanks for reviewing!! I think when you have your first feelings for someone, no matter who you are, everyone has trouble telling the person. No one likes rejection. Not even Heero Yuy. In this story the only way I made Millardo the protective older brother was his wanting to her to be happy and thus meddling where he shouldn't in her life. I will save future stories for him being against Heero. And yes it was Heero who punched him, he may not be good with his emotions but the man does know to fight, so that's what he acted upon.

Relena-wannabe 2012: Thanks for the review! I am sad to say this, but it doesn't, not yet anyway. It just proves that men are clueless in a funny sort of way, because Trowa was being spontaneous when he did it, he ventured away from the original plan. The mistletoe was originally for Heero and Relena, that's why they went out and got a but load of it. But don't worry Hehe….it just might come in handy later.

Jazzflame: woot woot THANKS FOR THE REVIEW!! Woot woot, here it is!! LMAO

Velaris: Thanks for the reviews!!! I am so glad you like where this is going. Don't worry there will be PLENTY of trouble! When people decide to stick their noses into people lives, especially love lives…it almost always means nothing but trouble! Funny trouble but trouble none the less!! I am really glad you like this story and thanks so much for the promise of more reviews!!

Meagain: Thanks so much for the review! I hope this is A.S.A.P. enough for you!! Glad you love it!! Mwuahaha...jealousy it a funny thing!

Chapter Seven: Mr. UPS Man

_**Sanq Kingdom, seven hours earlier. **_

"_You should be honored, they said" Ryan mumbled quietly to himself as he made his way up the long walkway, leaving his poop brown truck behind "you'll get to see Switzerland, they said! It's almost like a vacation, they said." _

_He knocked on the door the Peacecraft mansion and waited. _

_He heard someone stumble to the door and obviously smack into it. If he hadn't been so irritated he might have been concerned. But the only thing he could think about was a five hour plane ride to Switzerland in the Ups cargo plane sitting next to half a dozen gifts with no heat. Not to mention shorts and a truck with no freaking door. _

_He could hear someone slump next to the door as they clawed their way up "whooz iz it?" a male voice slurred. _

"_I'm hear to pick up A-"he looked at the electronic device he held in his hand "Miss Relena Peacecraft's packages, Sir" he wondered why the man at the other end had yet to open the door. _

"_I cantz zsee you?" the voice said from behind the door "are wu invizable?" _

_He heard a female voice giggle 'the peep hole doesn't work pigeon if you put your nose in it!" _

_Ryan was now utterly confused and looked down at the pad in his hand to make sure he had the right address, he did "would you mine opening the door so someone can sign?" _

_The door slowly opened and he now faced a elderly gentlemen wearing a Hawaiian style shit, pink and green to exact and very short, short, short, white shorts "iz yu herez for da firewords?" the gentleman reeked of alcohol, but seemed harmless enough._

"_Fireworks?" he asked confused "no, why?" _

_The old man swayed a little "becuz, itz da fourf o juwy!" _

_The female voice he'd hear before now appeared, she was a middle aged blond, by the look of her uniform she was the maid "you'll have to forgive him" she held out her hand to sign the pad "he's the butler, and he's on vacation." _

_Ryan just nodded handing her the pad, he didn't want to ask, he didn't want to know. _

_The female handed it back to him "the servants will load the packages for you." _

_He smiled at her, very thankful that someone sober was around. He made his way back to the truck when he heard the old man yell out at him…_

"_Anz dontz eve thnkz about steelinz za plink wimo, hew majestyz gavs itz to mu." _

_He looked back at the old man and laughed, hey, its five o clock somewhere? _

_The old man called out to him again "tew Rewena I sayz happu mozers duy!" _

"_Will do" he sighed. _

**Winner estate, Switzerland, present day. **

Ryan had been standing outside the grand double doors for almost twenty minutes now. His legs were freezing; he still couldn't understand why after a couple hundred years the company had not swayed from the all too familiar poop brown uniform. Why did they insist on keeping them in shorts? Maybe in the controlled climate of the colonies it was alright, but here he was in Switzerland, five degrees below zero, in poop brown shorts.

He looked down at his freckled red furry freezing legs and groaned. This estate must be packed with servants; it was the Winner residents after all. The guards at the front gate sure had given him quite the hassle, checking him for cameras and microphones. What was taking so long, it was cold. He'd traveled half way around the world to make sure he personally delivered these gifts; they were of the utmost importance as they belonged to the former queen of the world.

"_NOOOO"_

He heard a muffled scream come from inside and reached for the door knob, screw this, maybe the owner was in trouble. He walked into the deserted foyer and heard a commotion coming from a doorway just a few feet from him.

Right by the door laid a very tall man with half his face covered in hair, and blood. A woman with braids had her hand latched onto his nose holding his head up "it's not broken" she seemed pretty thankful at this.

Right above them stood another tall man with unruly brown hair wearing jeans and a white button up shirt. Ryan noticed his hair looked like it had never seen a brush before in it's life, he also noticed the gun at his hip. This particular man was staring angrily at the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen.

The couple looked familiar. It hit him, she was Relena Peacecraft and this guy must be her boyfriend he'd read about in the tabloids.

He immediately recognized the blond man that walked over to the man with the bloody nose. He was Quatre Winner; his family owned the company he worked for and his way to friendly face was plastered all over the building he worked at.

He was shocked no one had noticed him "excuse me?"

The man he assumed was the princess's boyfriend turned to glare at him "You should have knocked."

"I did" he almost squealed, this man made him incredible nervous. Something inside told him to be incredibly careful or he'd end up like the guy on the floor.

His eyes moved to the princess. She was absolutely gorgeous "Relena?" he asked even though he knew it was her.

She nodded "Yes, you've delivered my packages…" she seemed withdrawn and very tense.

He nodded and held out the pad for her to sign "I need you to sign please."

The blond man turned his head to look at the other occupants in the room "Wufei, Duo, would you please go get Miss Relena's packages from the truck" he look at Ryan's half frozen legs "I think this nice young mans been out in the cold long enough."

The Chinese man and the cute girl with the long braid seemed all too eager to leave them room as they rushed past him.

"Thank you, that wasn't necessary." Ryan said a little embarrassed to Quatre, basically the man who signed his paycheck.

Quatre just gave him a genuine smile before his attentions went back to the man with the bloody nose "what were you thinking?"

The man on the ground went to speak but was cut off by the woman holding his nose "it will be to hard to clean you up if your talking Trowa, so just keep your mouth shut" she seemed a little agitated at the injured man.

He noticed that Relena and the man with the messy hair were staring at one another; she had a genuinely confused expression on her face and if he read this mans correctly he would say it was rather possessive. That didn't make sense, this was Relena's boyfriend.

Curiosity got the best of him "I don't mean to be rude, but what's going on?"

A woman with long blond hair and eyebrows the strangely resembled a cock roach came to stand next to Relena "Our friend decided to kiss Miss Relena under the mistletoe" she gave an amused smirk to the man glaring at Relena "Heero here didn't like that to much, as you can tell."

Heero? Oh yes that was right, he remembered now "why would you kiss your friends girlfriend?" he suddenly noticed the layer of mistletoe that covered their floor.

The woman with the two braids had just finished cleaning her friend up when Trowa spoke "because I'm tired of pretending."

"He's not my boyfriend" Relena whispered.

So this Heero guy was not Relena's boyfriend? Then why and who punched this man named Trowa? Heero turned his infamous glare at him, as if he was silently telling him that it was none of his business.

Trowa leapt and made a show of grabbing Relena's hand and holding it to his heart "Relena I can't hold it in any longer" he said dramatically, Relena just looked frightened "I've been in love with you for years…I've been silently protecting you for three years now…."

Relena raised an eyebrow "no you haven't" she stated obviously not amused by his performance.

Ryan noticed the Chinese man and the cute girl with the long braid walk in and were standing behind him, enjoying the show.

Trowa lightly put a finger to her lips "shh, don't speak"

Heero's fist clenched and his knuckles went white. Ryan wondered what this fool was doing.

"Remember the way I held you on Libra?" Trowa asked, making quite a show of looking dreamy eyed.

"That wasn't you…" growled Heero.

Trowa seemed to ignore this "I remember the way you held me in your arms in Mariemaia's fortress; I know you care for me too."

Relena looked pale and somewhat guilty "Trowa I don't know what you're talking about, but we are just friends."

Trowa dramatically shook his head "no Relena, don't hide your feelings for me! I know you care! You followed me everywhere I went during the war…that means something Relena…"

Heero's eyes narrowed "no, she followed me around" he said possessively.

Trowa put a confused expression on his black and blue face "you sleep with the teddy bear I gave you for your birthday every night…well at least until Heero came around" he sneered giving Heero a distasteful look.

"No, no I don't" Relena flushed a bright red and looked incredibly embarrassed.

Heero grabbed Trowa by the collar "no, she sleeps with the teddy bear that _I _gave to her."

Trowa smiled as he smacked himself on the forehead and gave a face of realization "Oh-my-God! I am so embarrassed" he laughed "your right that was you Heero, what was I thinking?"

Heero seemed to relax a bit, even when Trowa put a hand on his shoulder "my apologies, turns out I don't have feelings for Relena…." he turned to Relena "my sincerest apologies Madame, it appears I was mistake for a moment."

Ryan finally noticed the other females in the room; they sat together at a table giggling hysterically. His eyes landed on another extremely attractive female with long platinum blond hair wearing a suit looking aggravated as she mumbled "you're a fucking idiot Barton."

Ryan cringed, her voice was rather deep and ladies were not supposed to use language like that. Looking at the cute girl with the braid he grew rather concerned, her load was heavy "here let me take that" he blushed grabbing the packages out of her arms.

The girl said nothing just smiled awkwardly and the Chinese man glared at him, maybe this was his girlfriend?

"Mr. Winner?" he said trying to get the ghostly pale mans attention.

Quatre pointed to the hideous display in the corner "you can put them under the tree."

Ryan stepped past the glaring couple in the doorway and into the living room. He looked around but couldn't find a Christmas tree anywhere. The room itself was big but it didn't have that many hiding places "Mr. Winner? I can't seem to find it" he felt really embarrassed.

The woman with the cockroach eyebrows spoke "its right there" she snarled and pointed.

No that wasn't right, that, thing, was not a tree. He turned to look at the braided girl and she just shrugged.

Relena put her hand on his shoulder and gave him a sad smile "I'm sorry, but that really is our tree" she seemed genuinely disappointed.

He followed the Chinese man as he put his load underneath the hideous looking display, wondering if it was just a culture thing. This group of people was so incredibly strange, not at all what he thought Mr. Winner would associate himself with, but to each their own.

He felt slightly disappointed when out of the corner of his eye a small skinny boy ran up to the cute girl with the braid an kissed her. The cute girl put her arm around the skinny boy and kissed him back. Ryan sighed inwardly; he'd been contemplating getting her number.

Quatre appeared at his side and he noticed for the first time the man was tightly gripping a pair of silver scissors "would you like to stay for tea?"

He looked at the scissors the blond man was clutching, looked at the tacky thing in the corner, the ground covered in mistletoe and the angry looking Heero guy who looked like he was on the verge of a killing spree "no I really have to be getting back, but thank you"

The actor with the black and blue face smiled at him "aw, you don't want to see the conclusion?"

Relena looked like she was about to be sick and he genuinely felt sorry for the girl being stuck in a house full of crazies. Then he remembered "Miss Relena I almost forgot! Pigeon wanted me to give a message."

He wasn't sure why she looked confused "Who is Pigeon?"

"Your butler, I think?" yes, he thought that was right, he was the one who answered the door.

"Oh you mean Pagan?" she asked.

"No" Ryan shook his head "I'm quite sure I heard the maid call him Pigeon."

"That's impossible" she said sourly "his name his Pagan."

"Pigeon"

"Pagan"

"Pigeon"

"No, Pagan!"

"NO PIGEON!"

Relena crossed her arms "I think I know the name of the family butler, anyway what was his message?"

Ryan gave her a cheesy grin "Pigeon…told me to tell you, happy mother's day!"

Relena stared at him dumbfounded but said nothing.

"Apparently" he started "you're also missing the fourth of July fire works!"

The entire room was silent.

"Can I ask you a strange question Miss Relena?" he asked, pushing his luck from her expression.

She nodded and Heero came to join her at her side both wearing similar annoyed yet confused expressions, as if he were the crazy one "why does he seem overly protective of a pink limo?"

He noticed Relena and Heero's expressions soften as they looked at each other. He decided it was better not to know.

"Well have a merry Christmas everyone, I will be on my way" he said with a little too much enthusiasm.

He let him self out and closed the door behind him. Instantly the frigid cold air hit his legs "damn it" he mumbled making his way down the stairs to his truck.

The front door opened and Quatre yelled out "I'll see about getting you some pants" he said genuinely as if the thought never occurred to him before.

Ryan smiled his thanks and waved a goodbye. When he got into his truck he heard the young man yell out again…

"Thanks Mr. UPS man!!"

~*~

The camera's angle rested on the face of Mary Anne, entertainment reporter and the UPS man crammed into his truck as he was seated at the wheel. His face was annoyed as she raised the microphone to his face "I should have told him to put doors on these damn things" he mumbled not too quietly.

"Now Ryan, give us the goods! Are they engaged? Have they set a date?" she asked him eagerly.

The red headed man stared into the camera seriously, thinking before he spoke. They might have been crazies, but they seemed nice "I would like to clear everything up…"

Mary Anne smiled brightly; finally get a real source on live television.

He was sure that something was going on concerning Relena when it came to that man Heero, however he just didn't see anything on her end of it, at least from what he surveyed for the brief period of time. This whole ordeal must be awful for her, people thinking she was involved with someone when she wasn't! How would she date other men? As inconvenient as the microphone was in his face, he really wanted to go home; he would help out the princess. He knew simply denying it wouldn't work with this gossip hungry whore, so he decided to go above and beyond for the woman who gave them all peace….

He smiled at the camera "Heero is gay" yup, that should clear everything up!


	8. Breakdown

An: O-M-G (because thats how I say it) I completely forgot in my last chapter to wish you all a merry Christmas!! Well happy new year! I'm pretty sure this will be my last chapter till next year....calm down its only a week! But hey the writing fairy might decide to smack me on the back of the head...who knows.

Hououza: Something Millardo might object to? Hmmm now isn't that interesting? Hehe thanks for the idea!! oh and he knows, Heero ALWAYS knows....as always thanks for the review!!

emotionalcrack: sorry about the confusion!! But I am glad you like the story! Thanks for the review!

TheBetanWerecat: of course it wont solve anything, hehe just my ming go bazerk! Don't worry...Ryan will get his, even though he was only trying to help!! I am glad you like the story thanks for the review!

Libra89: Thanks for reading and thanks for the review!!

faeriespark: I am dancing because you liked this chapter, no seriously I am!! Thanks for reviewing!

AgapeNuria: Another review, AWEOME!! thanks!!

Meagain: apparently not!! But what fun would that be anyway? Thanks for your reviews!!

Velaris: I was so happy when I read your review, even though I don't feel very inspired...all this stuff comes from my everyday life....trust me you don't want to know.....hehe thanks for your reviews!!

Vixen1: as much as I wish I could have this story done by new year I wont...but hey no pressure...thanks for replying about the title and I think your right but if I do decide to change it, it wont be until the story is completed. Thanks for the review!!

Foxtale3: yes I completely pictured Heero as the princess in my mind, wish you could have been there it was glorious!! I put UPS man in there because Relena's presents had to get there at some point so I was like......ah hell...lets see it through the eyes of another. Thanks for the review!!

Chapter Eight: Breakdown

"_CLICK"_

Relena locked her door and slowly backed away. Mildly afraid if she turned her gaze away from the door for even a moment someone would intrude on her privacy. The scene that had just played out in the last hour would forever be burned into her memory, whether she liked it or not.

She heard soft footsteps outside her door, and immediately tensed. She just wanted them, all of them, to leave her alone. Didn't they understand that none of it was funny? From the look on all their faces when the strange UPS driver left, no one was an innocent player in the game they'd concocted. For the life of her she couldn't figure out what they were playing at, wasn't sure if she wanted to find out.

"Relena…." Heero's said softly from the other side of the door.

Hearing his voice twisted her insides "go away" she said knowing full well a simple lock couldn't keep the infamous Heero Yuy out, not if he really wanted to get in.

"I'm sorry."

She wasn't sure how to respond, something in his voice was telling her he was apologizing for much more than his earlier actions. She placed her hand on the door "why are you really here?"

He didn't respond right away, she could feel him lean against the door "it's easier for me, when you know I'm here."

She lowered herself to sit with her back to the door "I don't understand"

"I didn't leave you" his body fell into the same position as hers.

She closed her eyes fighting back tears, grateful that a door was between them. It seemed like ages before either one of them spoke. Put her behind a podium in front thousands of people she could come up with a speech off the top of her head that would make your cry or knock your socks off, coming up with right words to say to the man she loved, nothing.

"I know" she said letting out a deep breath.

"'m sorry" he painfully repeated.

Even though he sounded genuine she couldn't squash the underling bitterness she felt or hide it in her tone "you keep saying that but you never really answered my question did you?" her voice grew louder and harsher "it's been made painfully clear to me how well you've stuck to your promise Heero."

"I don't understand…" he sounded confused.

"I'm not vice foreign minister anymore Heero, so you can go back and lurk in the shadows you seem to love so much-just find someone else to lurk around this time why don't you? I don't represent anything anymore, you don't have to protect me" the tears fell freely now and she did her best to hide them from her voice.

"I quite the preventer's Relena" his voice was angry "I wont be your body guard in two weeks."

"Good" she let her head hit the door "go, leave-you're good at doing that."

"Hn"

Abruptly she stood up and opened the door "why did you even take the job in the first place?"

Why did he walk out of the shadows and back into her life just too leave it again? It didn't make sense.

He put his hand on the door frame and his eyes searched the room for something before he looked back at her with the same unfeeling glare she was so used to "your brother thought it would make you happy" his tone turned condescending "but you have made it painfully clear you don't want me around."

"What-"she gasped "you wouldn't even talk to me! I tried to be friendly toward you Heero, you ignored me."

"I did not" he almost growled looking down at her.

She folded her arms and returned his glare full force "I can count on one hand how many words you spoke to me before we got here."

He leaned in "you know me Relena."

She supposed she did. It was childish of her to think three years could completely change him. He'd been there, everyday for three weeks going above and beyond so that she wouldn't so much as stub her toe. In his mind, he wasn't ignoring her.

'Why did you quite?" she sighed "you could have just been reassigned."

His voice was tired as he spoke "I would like to stay in one place for longer than two days."

"Where will you go?" she asked.

"That depends…" he said slowly.

"On what?" she prodded, hoping she wasn't asking too much.

She thought he was about to reach for her hand when they heard a muffled cough from around the corner.

Heero's eyes darted to the right then back to her "we have company."

Her face didn't conceal her disappointed as much as she would have liked it to "of course" she rolled her eyes and shut the door.

~*~

Duo saw Heero glare at him from where he was standing before he entered his room, he was in for a good ass kicking later "damn it" he scowled at his four comrades.

Wufei leaned back as he closed his eyes and crossed his legs "idiot woman should have asked him to stay" he said through clenched teeth.

Quatre looked at Wufei disapprovingly "not like she had the chance" he looked over a Duo.

"What" Duo said throwing his hands up in defense "it's not my fault I swallowed my spit."

Trowa gave a light chuckle "it is your fault we were spying."

"Hey I just wanted to make sure my buddy didn't screw anything up" he huffed.

Trowa rubbed the brim of his black and blue nose "looks like we screwed it up for him."

Quatre nodded in agreement "I wonder what he was going to say?"

Duo gave them a smug smile "Heero told us awhile back he was quitting didn't think it would take this long-I guess he wanted to see how Relena felt before he made a decision."

Quatre gave a puzzled look "he doesn't know how she feels, I don't understand."

Duo laid back with his hands behind his head "Relena doesn't know either; I think this is his way of figuring it out."

"I'm confused" Trowa looked at his friends.

Wufei rolled his eyes "weakling wont make the first move, he wants her to ask him to stay."

"I see" Quatre sighed.

"This is absurd" spat Wufei "she loves him, he loves her…idiots."

"I don't think so…" Quatre glared at Wufei offended "neither of them have given each other any indication of how they feel."

"Your right Quatre" Duo agreed "maybe we should tell him? I know Hilde said not to say anything but-"

"No" Trowa cut in "it's not for us to tell, plus it's not like Heero has actually admitted anything."

"Heero doesn't use words" Quatre said quietly.

A sly smile crept up Duo's face "maybe if we kidnapped her he would be so sickened with grief that when he finally did save her in the heat of the moment he would tell her how he feels!"

Trowa smacked him on the back of the head "yes Duo, lets do that-to bad when they get married Heero wont have any groomsmen."

Duo gave him a confused grin "hu?"

Trowa rolled his eyes "he'll kill us for kidnapping her."

Quatre laughed "where would we take her anyway, the garage?" he teased "your right, it's dangerously romantic."

Duo glared at the three of them, He had to come up with something "we have to approach this from a different angle…"

"I think your right."

~*~

"Oh no…"

"How in the-"

"Heero said he'd never kill again, right?"

"Yup you heard right folks" Mary Anne stood outside the gates of the Winner estate "this is Mary Anne coming to you live from Switzerland. I have it on good authority that Relena Peacecraft and her boyfriend of three weeks have just broken because of the brief arrival and sudden departure of Heero Yuy's new love interest, Ryan the UPS man. Relena is currently suffering from clinical depression…"

Millardo almost dropped the cup of fresh coffee he held in his hand "this is bad."

"What in the hell possessed him to-"Noin could even finish her sentence.

A worried smirk reached Millardo's face "I wonder if anything else could possibly go wrong?"

Noin sighed "things aren't going very well?"

He smirked "how could you tell?"

She stared back at the television, not really watching it. As bad as she felt for Trowa, she was glad his little stunt didn't backfire in his face. Ok well it does sort of did, but she was pretty sure he knew what he was getting himself into. Her only concern at the moment was Relena, it didn't appear she dealing to well with all her friends _help._

"Heero wants to talk to me" he said looking at his wife.

She rose and eyebrow "about?"

Millardo shrugged "I don't know it could be really good-"

"-Or it could be really bad" she finished.

Millardo sat down his cup "I'm going to talk him now" he kissed his wife on the forehead and walked out of the kitchen

~*~

Relena threw herself onto the bed. She turned her head and her teddy bear was staring intently at her, she reached over and pulled him close.

"I've miss you Mr. Teddy."

His eyes didn't twinkle like normal, he'd missed her too.

"I need you to do me a favor ok?"

He didn't appear to object.

"Alright I need to you to pretend to be Heero, ok?" she set the bear on the dresser and stood before it with her hands behind her back "Heero I need to tell you something…"

Mr. Teddy was doing a great job at impersonating Heero; his gaze was cold and emotionless.

"We've known each other for a long time…"

Mr. Teddy didn't like Heero, he was why he'd been stuffed into a drawer for three weeks, she was sure he'd put his jealousy aside-to help her.

"I just wanted you to know" damn this was harder than she thought it would be "that I am in love with you…"

Damn Mr. Teddy! He was too good. It's exactly what Heero would do.

"I've been in love from the very second you stepped on my toes while we were dancing."

Mr. Teddy just glared back at her, maybe he was confused.

Relena narrowed her eyes "you never did apologies for that by the way."

That amused Mr. Teddy.

She put her hand up in defense "ok now I know we haven't really done a lot of talking" she glared at the bear "you know with you disappearing for three years…"

Mr. Teddy stared back at her innocently.

"But despite everything you're the only man I'll ever love" she him a pathetic laugh "so lets just get married and have lots of babies ok?"

Now Mr. Teddy was silently laughing at her.

"You're too good at this; Heero must have taught you his tricks before he packed you into my suitcase."

Mr. Bear indicated nothing.

"Bastard."

~*~

Millardo shut the door to Heero's room and rubbed his hands together in a cold sweat, their talk had been….frightening to say the least. He tried to blink he eyes but they wouldn't budge. No coherent thoughts would enter his mind; he knew if he tried to speak it would come out a stuttering mess.

"Hey you ok man?" Duo asked as he passed him in the living room.

Millardo said nothing as he moved past the braided man. He tried though, god damn it he tried. Where was he going? Oh yeah the kitchen so he could cry in his wife's arms until the pain subsided. Where was the kitchen? Why did Quatre keep moving the Kitchen?

And why was Dorothy always standing in that one particular spot in the living room? Did she ever move? Why did she keep insisting on wearing that god awful purple and gold thing?

After a solid forty minutes he finally managed to find the kitchen that Quatre kept moving around "can't fool me" he muttered

Noin looked up from the paper "I guess it didn't go well…" she looked heartbroken.

Who was this angel? Oh right "I don't- I cant- he wont-straight jacket-he said- cat's lots of cats-he's insane-somebody turn down the music-"Millardo stuttered like a blithering idiot.

Noin shot up and moved her husband to a chair "One at a time sweet heart, it wont hurt so much that way."

He looked up and laughed at her hysterically "you want to know what he's getting her for Christmas?"

Noin sat back in her own chair looking concerned "yes" she took a drink of her coffee.

He pulled his feet up from the floor and rested his chin on his knees "a diamond ring" he started to rock himself back and forth.

"Aw, that's sweet…" she sighed, jewelry was a nice gift.

He looked back up at her and tears started to form in his eyes.

It finally hit her "no way" she dropped her cup and it shattered on the ground, coffee everywhere.

Millardo gave her a sympathetic look "its ok the kitchen keeps moving, no one will notice. But don't take to long getting it cleaned up! Everyone else will be to busy with all the wedding plans…."

She gave her husband a good smack and turned his head towards her shaking it slightly "explain!"

He started to laugh again "I asked him why-oh why did I ask him why?"

"What did he say?"

Millardo yanked her face to his and looked to make sure none was looking "it's a secret, you have to keep it a secret…he'll eat our babies if we tell."

"We don't have any babies" she hoped that might help him a little.

Millardo brought a finger to his lips "Shhh he can hear everything.... he's everywhere...watching us...."

She nodded "Why Millardo?"

"The babies" he squealed.

In frustration she yelled "WHY ZECHS?"

He started to laugh again "he said it's what she wanted for Christmas."


	9. Cold Shower

AN: Sorry it took so long to get out another chapter, my week was pretty busy with new years and everything. This chapter is pretty much just silliness.....enjoy, my deranged fans!!

Hououza: I guess we will see about those babies. Mostly it's just me being silly....But exactly why Millardo freaked I cant say at the moment, it was meant for Heero to tell Relena. As always thanks for the review!!

Lena: Well I am very glad you and your family are enjoying my silly little story!! Oh and haha the cats have nothing to do with anything....when the insane talk does it ever make sense? LOL Thanks for the review!

Northern: I have a lot of time on my hands, what can I say? Thanks for the review!

Faeriespark: Uh yeah... I don't know where any of this stuff comes from....but I am glad people like you are enjoying my weirdness! Thanks for the reviews!

Bloodfire87: It might be awhile before it works out, at least a couple more chapters anyway! Glad you like this thanks for the review!!

Chapter Nine: Cold Shower

Quatre ran his hand through his greasy hair and took another sip of tea, the dark circles were getting worse by the minute and he knew it "just one more paragraph...."

He looked at the stack of empty cups at the end of his desk "..then they will be happy and I can finally get some sleep."

The clock read 4:23 he'd been at it since eight the night before, they didn't care though. They were greedy......

"I just don't know how he is going to kill her this time..." he mumbled staring at the computer screen "four wedding, a funeral, they've had about three kids already...."

He let himself relax a little as he thought about the night before. Millardo's mental breakdown was scary to say the least, he really didn't understand why the older man was so furiousness with him...he kept screaming something about hiding rooms and cats. Heero and Relena locked themselves into their rooms for the remainder of the night and had not shown up for dinner. He still felt really bad that he was apart of the interruption during their conversation, they seemed to be headed in a good direction.

Noin had the decency to explain the entire situation...

Starting with Millardo's involvement in Heero's recent position down to the ring incident.

Well no, it wasn't an incident, not yet anyway.

What was Heero thinking? Shouldn't you a least date first? Was he even planning on telling her how he felt before he got down on bended knee? Maybe this was just the after affects of him self detonating...

"Well if it turns out interesting enough I might be able to use it..." he said to no one in particular as he started to type again.

The door to his office opened to reveal a very tired looking Duo and Noin who made themselves comfortable on the couch across from his desk.

"I see you couldn't sleep either" Duo said in the midst of a yawn.

Quatre nodded "I had some things to care of."

Noin noticed the the cups that lined his desk and gave him a sympathetic look "have you been in here all night?"

"Yes" he sighed.

"Whatcha doing Tre?" Duo lifted himself from the couch to walk over "I thought you were on vacation?"

Quatre slumped back into his chair "I guess you could call it an extra curricular activity..."

Duo came up behind the desk and looked at the computer screen "what the fuck is this Quatre?"

Noin looked up sleepily from where she was sitting and laughed "what is he looking at, porn?"

Duo shook his head "I don't know what this is" he scratched the top of his head and moved Quatre out of his seat to sit down "I've never seen anything like this before in my life...."

Quatre tried in vain to move Duo "thats private Duo!"

Noin made her way over "whats going on?"

"Are you Q-dog04?" Duo questioned as his eyes widened at what he saw "unbelievable!"

"What is this? Some kind of profile?" Noin pushed Quatre even farther away as she read over Duo's Shoulder.

_**Q-Dog04 has written 54 stories.... **_

_**Hey what up my homies!?Foshizzle! Word up! Sorry its taken me so long to update but me gots a life, ya feelin me dawg? **_

_**I wanna give a shout out to my BIOTCH CrazyBROWS99 for all her beta doin!! **_

_**So wont all my nizzles read and review aiiiiight!!! **_

_**A knight and his princess**_

_He wanted to kill her but she just wouldn't leave him alone...finally our knight is stalked into submission. _

_**A Baka's intervention **_

_You know that braided preventer you always see? Well his group of friends finally decided to confront him about the addiction that is tearing his family apart......his braid. _

_**Justice man and his sidekick Sally the wonder bra woman. **_

_The ongoing saga of our favorite super hero and how he and sally defeat evil and defend justice with his pink leotard and tutu and her humongous boobs. _

_**The only Two **_

_The earth as undergone a nuclear attack- the only ones left....Cher and Dorothy Catalonia...and they said only cock roaches would survive..oh wait...co-author CrazyBROWS99_

_**The original Emo**_

_The sad story about a clown who could only see out of one eye...the music...the clothes...insanity drove him into madness. _

_**Big girls don't cry**_

_They made him fight...he didn't want to be a soldier. All this platinum haired young prince wanted to be was a-girl! A heartwarming story about how a wife and a sister deal with the sex change. _

Noin couldn't read any further and she hit the button to turn off the monitor "All these years Quatre...you've been making fun of us?"

Quatre suddenly found his shoes very interesting "It was Dorothy's idea..."

"Sally's humongous boobs" Duo chuckled.

Noin looked at him disgusted "he made fun of your braid."

"If I got mad every time someone made fun of my braid.." he thought for a moment "I'd be a very angry person!"

Noin threw her hands up defeated "ok Quatre, I don't want to know what that is about...what you are doing...why you are doing it...I am just going to forget what I saw."

Quatre decided to change the subject "So how is Millardo doing?"

"Not good" she sighed "he took it pretty hard. I am dyeing to know what Heero said to him."

"Do you think we should talk to Heero about it? I mean its pretty extreme." asked Duo fingering the end of his braid.

"I think we should, so he doesn't go and humiliate himself" said Quatre

"Humiliate?" Noin asked "what do you mean?"

"There is no way she'd say yes" Duo grinned but the look on Noin's face made him doubt the situation "right?"

She shrugged "with those crazy kids, who knows?"

~*~

Millardo drew a heart in the steam that enveloped the bathroom mirror "happy, happy cats."

He still couldn't understand why he was in this crazy land with all the fairies. But maybe if he questioned it out loud they would make him leave again.

It was so happy here he couldn't understand why that...woman...what was her name again? Oh never mind...she didn't want to come, she was crazy

In this land he could hide all the babies...

"The babies are safe now, they wanted to come" he purred.

Heero couldn't get him and the babies here. It was a secret safe place. The babies really liked it...they'd just finished the ride on the good ship lollipop.

"Where bob-bons play on the sunny beach of peppermint bay..." he sang with the babies.

~*~

"Can I go back to my writing now?" Quatre asked sheepishly

"NO" Noin and Duo said in unison.

Quatre slid down into his chair "they are going to be so disappointed" he mumbled.

"Ok" Duo began "Now back to why we are here, Heero and Relena."

"Right" Said Noin.

Well none of the were really sure where to go from there. What were they supposed to do now?

"Listen" Quatre began "I know its early but I am sure Heero is already awake, why don't we just go talk to him?"

Noin and Duo looked at each other before reluctantly agreeing and followed him out of the office.

"You knock..." whispered Duo "It was your idea."

Quatre shook his head violently in fear.

Noin glared at the two idiots "I'll do it" she knocked.

~*~

"Peanut, peanut butter and JELLY"

He wasn't sure where he learned that song, but he couldn't get it out of his head. The babies had made him a crown of daises and dress that the even the queen herself would be envious to wear.

"Thank you! Thank you!" he said with tears of joy rolling down his cheeks "first I would like to thank my mother, god rest her soul. And God...this goes out to god. This couldn't have been at all possible with out the Rollie pollie fish heads..."

A roar of applause could be heard.

"I've made it! I'm finally a Princess!"

Wufei would be so jealous.

~*~

"It's none of your business" growled a perturbed and rather Sleepy Heero Yuy as he slammed the door in their faces.

"Well that went well, Quatre" glared Duo in his friends direction. Apparently Heero wasn't going to be as open with them as he had Millardo.

"It was worth a shot..."

Noin sighed "we need to do something about Millardo before Relena sees him...she cant find out."

"Your right" agreed Duo "Heero can deal with the ring mess himself."

Quatre's eyes went wide with horror "No I cant-we cant! He's mad at me......"

"Why?" Asked Duo.

Noin Laughed "It doesn't matter. But I should warn you, he's very protective of his babies right now."

"Babies?"

"Come on" she commanded and they followed.

~*~

"I feel pretty oh so pretty, I feel pretty and witty and bright..." he sang as he danced in the fields of wildflowers. No one could possibly imagine the happiness he felt in this very moment.

"And I pity any girl who isn't me tonight" The sound of his voice was like angels singing, or so they said.

Duo and Quatre's jaw's dropped at the sight before them. Millardo had the shower going full blast and steam engulfed the rather large bathroom. Currently he was twirling in one of his Wifes unflattering dressing, singing very much out of tune.

"Oh god" Quatre covered his ears "Its hurts....it hurts."

Noin put her hands on her hips and glared at her husband "I leave him alone for just a few minutes..."

"HAHAHAHAHA" Duo pointed and laughed "I think I peed my pants, just a little."

"Make it stop" Quatre whined.

Noin pushed her sleeves up and turned the water to cold "this might get ugly"

Duo saluted her "What are your ordered Lieutenant?"

She couldn't help but smirk "hold him down for me..."

Quatre cringed as Duo launched himself at the lightening count "gotcha!"

Millardo screamed "THEY FOUND US!"

Quatre grabbed the mans leg's as he kicked and screamed. Duo held down his front as Noin sprayed the cold water directly into his face.

"Is he dead?" Quatre asked observing the now silent man in the tub.

"I don't think so" Noin answered concerned.

"He's awful quite" said Duo backing away.

Noin shut off the water and stepped back next to the two men.

Millardo's eyes shot open and he glared at them "Are they married yet?"

They all nervously shook their heads.

He looked down at himself "I liked this dress better on you."

Quatre bravely stepped up "Would you like to tell us what happened with Heero?"

Millardo sat in thought for a moment before he answered "No I am going to let it play out and see what happens..."

"What?" Noin screeched. After all this mess, his mental breakdown and everything suddenly everything was ok? Hell no, he was in her dress god damn it.

"Well" he sighed ignoring the dress, the cold water and the bunnies drawn on the mirror in the steam "I have had some time to re think things and if Heero can express to Relena what he expressed to me...then I think everything will be fine."

"I thought you were upset about the situation?"Duo asked in disbelief.

"No" he shook his head "I was in shock...."

"So your not going to tell us?" Noin asked angrily.

"Its not really any of your business" he said defiantly.

"What do you mean by that? Why do you get to know and we don't?" Duo inquired.

"Because I'm her brother...." he looked at them like they were all idiots "...and he needed my blessing."

Noin sat at the edge of the tub and grabbed her husbands cold hand "He asked for your blessing?"

He nodded in response.

"Did you give it to him?" She asked softly.

"I kind of blacked out after he gave me the whole story....I've never heard him say so much at one time" he answered honestly.

"Alright well" she sighed yanking him from the tub "lets get you cleaned up."


	10. Cups Of Coffee

AN: Unbelievable!! My last chapter a crap load of people put this story on their favorites list, but only one review?? (by my favorite and most faithful reviewer of course) Come on people, where is the love????

Hououza: As always thanks for the review! I have no idea how Dorothy convinced him to do it. But really, do we want to know? Don't worry about Millardo he'll come through, always does (if you don't count the giant laser pointed at the earth…)

Chapter Ten: Cups of Coffee

It wasn't even dawn yet and she'd been awake for hours. Staring at the wall like it was something interesting. She'd tried not to let her mind wander to the man next door, it wasn't a plan that was working no matter how much effort she put into it. Just a few minutes earlier she had her a few muffled voices and a very loud slam, who in their right mind would disturb a former assassin in the midst of his slumber?

Only Duo, she laughed inwardly.

Giving up she decided to go down stairs and make herself a pot of coffee. They'd missed her presence at dinner so she supposed it wouldn't hurt to leave her warm bed early. Still she wondered what anyone on vacation would be doing awake at this hour, as far as she knew she was the only one having men problems, so to speak.

Thankfully the light was on in the kitchen, when she entered she was greeted by Heero's back, cup of coffee already in his hand.

"What are you doing up so early?" She asked quietly, hoping she wasn't disturbing him.

Their last conversation had left her wanting and confused. It seemed like there was so much more he'd wanted to say. She immediately pushed that line of thinking from her mind; it would do no good to get her hopes up.

"Duo decided to pay me a visit" he said with little humor.

She smiled as he poured her a cup "so I was right, I thought it was Duo."

He returned her smile with a smirk "he certainly is a brave one, I'll give him that."

She took a sip of the hot coffee not quite sure where to go from there. There where still so many questions…

He broke the silence "I'm sorry about the last few weeks."

She sighed inwardly. Sorry must be the newest addition to his vocabulary he seemed to be saying it a lot "you said that last night."

He nodded "but I need to understand, it's not how I meant it to be."

"How you meant what to be exactly?" Now she was confused.

He made eye contact with her briefly before staring back down into his coffee cup "us" he said so quite she almost couldn't hear.

Not that she had never wanted there to be but, "I wasn't aware there was and us, Heero."

He gave her a week smile, the first one she'd ever seen grace his handsome face and he was at a loss for words.

Taking pity on him she felt the need to lighten the mood "Heero have you been my boyfriend this entire time and I just didn't know it?"

He let out a light chuckle, a first "have you heard the newest story in the tabloids?"

She shook her head, what could it possibly be now?

"Apparently" humor sparkled in his eyes "I'm having an affair with the guy who delivered your packages."

Hey eyes went wide "No."

He went to the counter to pour himself another cup and spoke again "that's not it. It seems your suffering from clinical depression because of it."

She laughed "yes I am utterly heartbroken."

He moved to sit back down and the humor left his face "It seems like for awhile anyway, they won't be bothering you."

She nodded in agreement confused as to why he seemed mildly upset "It will clear up, with you leaving again."

His face went emotionless. She wasn't sure what to say, it seemed she'd hit a nerve. Did what she say the night before bother him that much?

"I'm sorry… about what I said last night" her apology was genuine even though the situation continued to confuse her.

He made a sudden move to grab her hand. In the sheer shock of it she jumped at the touch and her coffee spilled onto the floor.

"Oh no…" she groaned. Not only was she embarrassed, what in the world could he be thinking?

"It's alright stay put, I'll get it" he said coolly.

"No-"

"I'll get it" his tone was non argumentative. He knelt down before her and started to clean up the mess.

He was so close, his breath smelled like coffee and he smelt faintly of soap. Maybe because it was him, but it was simply intoxicating. She noticed he had a faint scar on the left side of his face, and another one on his shoulder. How many more did he have?

"Relena…" he said pulling her from her daze. The towel and the pieces of glass had been pushed aside

She couldn't remember the last time they'd been this close. Ah yes, Libra, "thank you."

He seemed to be on the same wave link "remember when we were on Libra, and I asked you to believe in me?"

"Yes…" she answered barely above a whisper.

"I really wanted to kiss you but-"

She laughed nervously cutting him off "those damn helmets."

He nodded but his gaze didn't waver "I thought it would be the only chance I would ever get…."

Her breath caught as he tenderly traced the line of her jaw with the tips of his fingers and gently brought her face down to meet his, she closed her eyes…..

"NOOOOOOOO"

A yell could be heard from a few feet away and when she opened her eyes Duo Maxwell was lying on top of Heero making an attempt to subdue his fighting any very angry friend.

"Don't do it man, don't do it!" Said Duo panicked "you'll ruin everything."

"Maxwell" Heero growled "get off of me."

"What's going on?" She had been this close, this close! What were they trying to do? Sabotage everything?

"I plead the fifth" he squealed.

Heero overthrew Duo and brought him to his feet by the collar of his shirt "explain" he demanded.

Duo waved his hands in surrender "can we talk about this in private…." His eyes kept darting to Relena in an attempt to convey the need for secrecy.

Heero turned to her and gave her an apologetic expression.

"Who needs enemies when I have friends like these…" she mumbled into the silence of the kitchen.

~*~

"I thought you were going to propose…" Duo said as his body slid down the wall, for the third time.

"I told you earlier, it's none of you business" Heero said, ready to pounce again.

Once again Duo had been spying. In his defense he'd only witnessed the scene for a few brief seconds before his mouth betrayed him. All he knew was Heero was down on one knee….

Relena was a smart girl. He didn't want to see his friend crash and burn. But now, his head hurt and he wished he could take those damning words back.

"Listen..." he began "I don't' know what going on in that psychotic-suicidal-self destructive-obsessive compulsive-"

"Get to the point" Heero said loosing his patience.

"I just don't want to see her turn you down…" he tried to say with as much care toward his friend as he could, considering the circumstances an all.

Heero seemed to take that in consideration for a moment before he spoke "stay out of our business."

Duo nodded, not wanting to be slammed into the wall again.

~*~

"The injustice…" Wufei grumbled pressing the pillow even harder onto his head "she snores like a cow with a cat stuck in its throat…."

Angrily he pulled the covers back and stood to stare at his true love "if I didn't love you so much I would slice you in half you insufferable woman."

She rolled over onto the middle of the bed and started to snore even louder.

"Well played woman, well played" he growled.

He shut the door softly behind himself, not that it mattered.

Hilde was just exiting her room as he started walking down the hallway "wait up" she called out.

He turned to her "why are you up so early?" He didn't care; he wasn't sure why he was asking.

She brought her hand to her mouth to let a tired yawn before answering "Duo wasn't in bed so I thought he might be around here causing trouble" she knew her husband to well.

"You're smarter than you look" he said dryly

She'd spent enough time in Wufei's company to go ahead and take it as a compliment "well aren't we all sunshine and daisies in the morning."

He ignored her as they mad their way down the flight of stairs and headed for the kitchen, ignoring the yelps coming from Heero's room.

Relena sat alone flipping through infomercials in the kitchen with the most unpleasant scowl on her normal graceful features. Wufei ignored it and poured himself a cup of coffee.

"What could have possibly gone wrong this early in the morning?" Hilde made a bad attempt at teasing.

Relena defiantly wasn't in the mood to be cheered up. "Why don't you go ask your boyfriend?"

Wufei threw Hilde and amused smirk "right as always."

"What did he do now?" Hilde asked waiting for the worst.

"I think…" Relena began "I think Heero was about to kiss me…."

Wufei decided to find yesterday's news paper that was still lying on the counter more interesting than the private conversation the two women were having "Yuy finally got the nerve" he mumbled quietly.

Hilde smile reached her eyes "are you serious?"

Relena's grave expression didn't go unnoticed "then Duo pounced on him screaming for him not to do it…"

Wufei eyes lit up as they met contact with Hilde's "so that was what we heard" his expression amused "serves him right."

Hilde rolled her eyes then gave Relena a sympathetic look "I'm going to talk to Duo, apparently he was mistaken."

Wufei nodded in agreement "seems that way."

Relena eyed her two friends suspiciously "what do you mean he was, mistaken?"

Well what was she supposed to say now, oh yeah duo thought Heero was about to ask you to marry him?

"Well…" she laughed nervously "…you know he probably thought Heero was making good on his threat to kill you, or something."

"How, with his poisoned lips-" Wufei scoffed, not amused at the pathetic attempt at a cover up "we've all known Maxwell has had a crush on Yuy for years."

Finally a smile cracked on Relena's lips "I always thought….."

"Hey..." Hilde cut her off "not cool Wufei, not cool."

"Got any coffee left?" asked duo as he walk into the kitchen rubbing the back of his head, with a slight limp.

Wufei nodded and grabbed and extra glass from the cabinet while Relena and Hilde shot Duo hateful glares.

"I was just telling Relena" Hilde said staring her boyfriend down, daring him to contradict her "that you intruded because you were playing some sort of sick joke."

He seemed to take the hint and gave Relena an apologetic smile "yeah you know- I think the weirdest things are funny early in the morning."

She knew they were hiding something, Duo wasn't a good liar and Hilde was worse. But for Wufei to stoop so low, she thought he was above that.

"Everyone should be up soon I suppose" she said more or less to change the subject.

"Well not Quatre…" Duo laughed.

"Is he sick?" asked Hilde with genuine concern for her fragile blond friend.

Duo over exaggerated his normally cheesy grin while he poured himself a cup of coffee. He made a show of sitting down before he spoke "would you like to know what Quatre and Dorothy are into these days…."

Wufei face was contorted with disgust "enough" he slammed his cup down and made a bee line for the door.

Relena and Hilde eyed him warily, did they really want to know?

"Well Noin and I were in his office earlier….."


	11. Confession

**AN IMPORTANT: ** This is the last chapter I am posting until I complete the story. Calm down, don't worry. It shouldn't be anymore than two weeks. I have two maybe three chapters left. I am currently working on a new story and I don't write on my days off. Anyway don't forget to leave me some love!!

_**So that there is no confusion, I would go back and review Quatre's fiction in chapter nine before you read this chapter. **_

Emotionalcrack : Thanks so much for the review, I am glad you enjoyed the last chapter.

Goddess of Wings 06: Well here ya go, now you can stop waiting not so patiently!! LOL thanks for the review.

Anonymous C: Thanks for the review and I liked that line too!!

Bloodfire87 : I would have killed him too. But remember Relena is a pacifist and Heero said he'd never kill again!! Hehe Thanks for the review!!

Hououza: No no you have it all wrong! Dorothy and Quatre stay up all night writing stories because in my stories the characters wait until marriage, I am a good Christian girl after all! Now if you'll excuse me I have to move very quickly so I am not struck down by a bolt of lightening....... j/k as always thanks for the review!

Northern: Dramatic? Hmmm I'll take it as a compliment! Silly, you betcha, bizarre, sure, pointless, I would have to agree....Dramatic? I just don't know...LOL thanks for the review!!

Chapter Eleven: Confession

Relena couldn't help but notice Heero seemed oddly comfortable at the dinner table between Trowa and Duo. Despite poor Trowa's temporarily disfigured nose and Duo insistence on switching out the frozen vegetable in the freezer to hold to his head, it seemed as if nothing had occurred in the last twenty four hours.

Quatre and Dorothy hadn't talked much the entire day, needles to say not everyone was as humorous about their little writing outlet as Duo had been. They were, if only slightly, temporary outcasts. Wufei didn't find his pink tutu so amusing and Sally seemed slightly mortified about a series concerning the size of her breast.

Trowa seemed utterly confused by his story. He kept asking Quatre what an Emo even was, why he was slicing his wrist in every chapter and what was with those god forsaken cry baby lyrics Quatre kept having him sing…..he was pretty glad Quatre hadn't changed his hair and had voiced that. Quatre and Dorothy just giggled at their little inside joke.

Millardo and Noin had surprisingly taken the time to read their bizarre little piece fiction….lets just say it was heart warming and there was a box of tissues missing, on Millardo's end anyway. Noin's face was still as pale as ghost after reading the explicit love scene between her and her husb-no wife. Relena wasn't sure if she'd ever fully recover from that one.

Relena herself would never be able to look at her shy blond friend the same way again…

22 Relena bashing stories, 101 ways to kill Relena winter festival contest, the HY&DM community he'd formed, whatever that was…..his new hobby was unnerving, to say the least.

Heero as usual seemed un fazed, but appeared to take mental notes on the more….Relena friendly stories.

No one had left her and Heero alone for more then two seconds the entire day, something was going on she knew it. Everyone was being strangely secretive and she still hadn't forgiven Duo, but he was hard to stay mad at for long.

"And then he said" Duo always chomping on his food in mid sentence " well my kid got sent home from school for sleeping with the teacher…and the other guy slapped him a high five and asked what school he went to…and the other guy replied….well that's the thing, my son is home schooled!"

Millardo hid a snicker behind a cough and Hilde threw a bun at her boyfriends head "that was so stupid Duo!"

Duo shrugged "ok, you guys want to hear about the girl and the donkey show?" Another roll was thrown to silence him.

After dinner her brother pulled her aside….

"I'm sure you've guessed by now something has been going on" he stated, slight guilt in his voice.

"It's a bit much," she confessed. "First you getting Heero to come work for me, then the tabloid issue. Now everyone has been acting so strange. I mean Trowa kissed me, he kissed me!"

His laugh was dry "ah yes, the ever helpful Trowa. Quite a performance if I do say so myself."

"Would you like to fill me in?" She pleaded.

"Relena," he sighed. "I think you should consider the possibility that Heero cares about you very deeply."

She noticed he sounded a little sad "you seem disappointed."

"No, just worried about you" he said honestly, sounding very much like an older brother.

"But you still won't tell me the whole story," she mused. "I suppose you're not the one I should be talking to."

He nodded "correct." He put his arm around his sister's shoulders, "I love you Relena, the only thing I want for you is to be is happy."

~*~

"This is unjustifiable," snorted Wufei "I am just going to do it myself."

"So you're going to propose for me, I think Sally might have a problem with that." Heero had moved his laptop down to the living room and was currently working on one of his last reports.

"Don't twist my words around Yuy, she probably knows by now anyway"

Heero raised an eyebrow "you think?" It was a good question considering the entire house, because of Zech's big mouth, knew.

Wufei couldn't help but smirk at the man is this pathetic situation "I would highly consider you ask her out on a date first."

Now it was Heero's turn to smirk "I have already been on a date with Relena," he said this proudly.

"Right, when?"

Heero thought for a moment "St. Gabriel's dance, we ate dinner a few times together when Quatre and I visited the Sanq kingdom" his eyes lit up "Libra," his tone was affectionate, well affectionate enough for the perfect soldier.

Wufei almost burst out in laughter, almost. "I don't think those qualify as dates."

Heero ignored him and continued his report.

"I would like to ask you a question" Wufei asked seriously and Heero nodded. "When did you buy the ring?"

"The day she resigned," he seemed regretful "I just didn't think it would take this long."

"You've really had it that long?" Wufei asked.

Heero nodded "do you think she'll say yes?"

Wufei snorted "how should I know?" He decided to take Heero's feelings into a little more consideration, despite himself, "I do know she loves you though, that should be enough for now."

~*~

"The Get Heero and Relena together club as hereby been renamed to, make sure Heero doesn't propose but still get Heero and Relena together, club," said Duo standing on top the desk in Quatre's office "now down to serious business-"

"I had no idea I was apart of club" Quatre's eyes were shining with pride "my dad would have been so proud."

Trowa seemed confused "is this a meeting?"

Duo nodded "I screwed up guys, I really screwed up."

Quatre and Trowa just stared at him, waiting.

"Heero was about to kiss her, I thought her was going to propose," Duo turned red with embarrassment. "Anyway, I sort of jumped Heero."

"Interesting idea…" Quatre said quietly to himself.

Trowa serious as always, "so what are we going to do now?"

"Wait, where is Wufei?" asked Quatre.

Duo still standing on the desk answered, "He has infiltrated past enemy lines, to get the potentially dangerous information we seek!"

"……"

"……"

Duo sighed jumping down from the desk "he's talking to Heero."

The two men nodded but Quatre spoke first "why would Heero talk to Wufei if he wouldn't talk to the rest of us?"

Trowa answered for Duo "more than likely in Heero's mind, Wufei would be the more trust worthy person to speak to. Wufei's not the type to go poking his nose in other people's business."

Duo rubbed his hands together and let out an evil laugh "my plan is puuuuurfect!! He'll never suspect a thing!"

"Mission aborted" said Wufei walking in and slamming the door behind him.

"On what grounds Chang?" huffed Duo "what did you find out?"

Wufei leaned against the back of the door "I think we should let nature take its course, so to speak."

"The bathroom is around the corner" Quatre pointed to the left.

Trowa rolled his eyes "are you sure?"

Wufei nodded "he's put a great deal of thought behind it and I believe he deserves a fair chance, shot down or not."

"Your crazy," Duo spat "he needs to ask her out, and then tell her how he feels…"

"Heero would argue the dating factor" Wufei said with a smirk "and as for telling her how he feels, Duo, I believe you have interrupted him…oh what is it, twice now."

"Touché"

~*~

She decided the almost kiss was good enough; at least it gave her some courage. Some inkling that he did have feelings for her. How strong those feelings might be, she didn't have a clue.

There he was, all alone in the living room, finally. Now if one of her girlfriends didn't walk in she might be able to do what she came here for. Broken hearts be damned, she was finally going to get this off her chest.

He was typing away as usual. If he noticed her presence he didn't show it.

"Is that important?" she asked sitting next to him trying to keep her voice at ease.

He nodded and continued typing. He was quiting, whatever he was currently working on couldn't be that important.

Damn laptop, she'd had quite enough of it. Daring her own demise she quickly shut it and slipped it underneath herself to sit on.

"What the-"he mumbled. She was quicker than he thought. "I need that back."

"This is the decision of your life Heero Yuy, me or your lap top."

He made a small show of putting some though into it, "decisions, decisions."

She reached beneath her and handed it back to him, "I had to get your attention somehow."

His expression softened and he put the laptop on the table in front of them "It can wait."

Relieved she relaxed, "I need to tell you something, Heero."

He studied her for a moment, "do you know?"

"Know what?" What was he talking about? Know what?

His eyes darted to the doorway then back to her "no one has said anything to you?"

Aggravated she crossed her arms "I don't know what your talking about. I am out of the loop, as usual," she said crossly.

He entwined their fingers together and gently pulled her closer to him on the couch "what did you want to tell me?"

She allowed her head to rest on his chest"I don't want you to leave again," she said softly. "I love you Heero."

She waited for it. Waited for him to tense up and push her away. Braced herself for the silent treatment he would mostly likely give her until he left her again. At least now she wouldn't have to wonder, she'd done her part. It would be little comfort but at least it was something.

He took a deep breath and gazed at her for what seemed like an eternity "I was going to wait till tomorrow....."

He didn't push her away and she relaxed even more as he wrapped his arms around her "what happens tomorrow?"

"I think I should start from the beginning....."


	12. It was In the suitcase

AN: Well here you go, the last three chapters as promised! A day later than planned...

I would like to thank all of you who have reviewed and those of you who haven't but have at least made it this far in the story.

**This was meant to be a silly pointless fic**...something to get the weirdness out of my system. I have no beta so thanks for suffering through it! I received a lot more reviews for this story than I thought possible, I really didn't think people would like it...well YAY for me!!

If you're one of my faithful reviewers don't forget to leave me your last review! If you haven't reviewed yet...leave me some love (even though you don't have to because I finished the story)

Chapter Twelve: It was In The Suitcase

Heero grabbed her hand and led her up the stairs "I have a lot I need to say, I don't want to be interrupted this time."

She followed him silently to her room and made her way to sit at the edge of her bed; Heero shut and locked the door. Leaning against it he closed his eyes taking a deep breath.

"Heero?"

"Give me a minute," his voiced sounded almost pleading. "I'm not used to this."

She sat waiting, wondering after her own confession what could possibly be so difficult for him. He hadn't responded earlier and she started to worry this was going down another path, had she pushed it? Had she come on to strong? Would he push her away? The longer he stood there the more she regretted admitting her feelings.

His eyes opened but he didn't move from the door. "I bought a house," he began. "It has five bedrooms."

"That's nice," she said as sweetly as she could, not sure where he was going with this.

"I want four."

"You want four houses?" She asked wondering what he would possibly do with that many.

He shook his head. "I want four children."

She looked down in shock at her petite waist line and wondered if that would even be a possibility. Then it occurred to her that he might be speaking about her…

"I have money saved and I own a company now," he said inching toward her. "Do you think your father would have approved?"

She wondered if her father was alive why he would care about Heero having a house-a house full of children. She suddenly got the feeling that she was being dense and wanted to laugh. "I'm sure he would have been very happy for you Heero, had he known you."

He backed away. "I'm not doing this right," his voice was agitated.

~*~

"I'm losing her," Millardo sighed as he and his wife stood at the bottom of the steps. "Remind me that I wanted this, please?"

"Don't think of it as losing a sister, think of it as gaining the perfect soldier," Noin teased her husband.

He winced. "They'll have suicidal toddlers, I'm sure."

"They would only be half Heero. So bipolar at best," she laughed. "We don't even know the verdict yet, they've been up there a long time. I thought he was waiting till Christmas?"

He gave his wife a weary look. "I think if he would have waiting any longer, we _ALL_ would have ruined their chances."

She jabbed him the ribs. "You must mean, you men," she gave him a stern look and he just smiled, she was always right.

~*~

Trowa studied himself in the mirror "you know Quatre, I think I could do with some eyeliner-it really would make my _eye_ pop."

Quatre sunk low into his chair. "It was just a story…."

Duo rolled his eyes. "So have we all come to an agreement?"

"No," sneered Wufei. "Your plan is absolutely ridiculous. I am embarrassed to be in your very presence."

Trowa studied himself some more. "Quatre, I do think it would flatter my figure more if I broke down and bought some women's jeans…."

"Hello," Duo waved his hands in front of Trowa. "Earth to Trowa, the mother ship has landed, you can return to earth."

Trowa moved to sit back down next to Quatre. "I heard you Duo and I agree with Wufei. Not only is it absurd, I have an almost broken nose," he touched the brim of his nose shooting his friends hateful looks." I've done my part."

"You're on your own Duo," Quatre said gravely, wondering if his friend was really stupid enough to go through with his plan.

"This is the Get-Heero-and-Relena-together-but-don't-let-Heero-propose-so-we-have-to-steal-the-ring-club," Duo said in one long exasperated breath. "It's not a club if I am the only one doing all the work!"

Trowa bitterly pointed to his nose.

"I am not putting my perfect face on line because your bored Maxwell," growled Wufei.

"Tisk, Tisk, Chang! It's a sin to be so conceited," Duo dared to tease.

~*~

"Relena I…"

She sighed, he'd been going back and fourth for ages now. "That's my name, don't wear it out," she mumbled.

"Relena I…"

She raised an eyebrow.

He moved to sit next to her on the bed "I don't think I'm good enough for you," he began. "Turns out I have a quality I never knew I had."

"What's that?" she asked resting her chin on the top of his head.

"I'm selfish."

~*~

"Now if I was a ring where would I hide…."mumbled duo, whose entire body was currently under the bed of a one Heero Yuy.

Next he checked the pillow cases "nothing there…"

He walked toward the small closet and opened both doors. It was almost barren except for the three shirts and two pairs of jeans. "Only must have brought one pair of shoes then old buddy."

He rummaged through the top drawer that to his surprised it only contained socks. "Looks like our commando goes commando," he snickered.

From what Duo observed there wasn't much to the room. Heero wouldn't be stupid enough to carry it on him.

Looking at the floor, Duo grinned.

~*~

"I love you, Relena."

"I loved you too," she lovingly replied.

When he removed himself from her embrace she immediately missed the warmth. He went to her closet and opened one of her suitcases.

"Heero, what are you doing?"

~*~

"DUO WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY HOUSE?" Quatre yelled at the top of his lungs, silver scissors in hand, ready to kill.

Duo currently sat in a big heaping pile of dug up floor boards holding the fireplace poker in mid swing. "Looking for the ring."

"Be quiet guys Milliardo said they were in her room," scolded Trowa. "Right next door," he emphasized.

Wufei's eyes went wide as he scanned the devastation "Heero is going to kill you."

"You think he'll notice?" Duo asked sheepishly.

Quatre now red in the face was being held back by Trowa. "Heero," Quatre said darkly. "Is not the one you should be worrying about right now."

~*~

"What was that?" The loud noises from the next room interrupted her line of questioning.

Heero looked at the door for a moment before his expression turned amused. "I think they are looking for something."

"In your room?" she asked.

Heero nodded the amused expression seemed to grow by the second as he leaned toward the door and listened to the voices.

Relena jumped when she heard the yelling start. "Don't you think we should check it out?"

"No."

"Heero," she tried to argue. "They are in your room."

"But you're in this room."

Her mood lightened when she realized they'd been alone together for hours with no interruptions, briefly forgetting what he'd been concealing in her suitcase.

"They are searching for your Christmas present," he confessed.

She went to ask what the commotion was about when he put his finger to her lips and knelt in front of her. He didn't seem calm. He seemed incredibly anxious. She wondered what he could possibly be so uneasy about.

"It's taken me a long time to get to this point in my life and I don't feel like I can continue without you by my side," he said entwining their hands together.

"What are you saying?"

"I don't have much to offer you…." His voice wavered and he couldn't look at her anymore. "But I want to give you my life."

Her entire body froze, this was not what she had been expecting, what was he doing?

"I love you Relena Peacecraft," he continued seemingly a little surer of himself. "I want you to be my wife."

"I…"

~*~

"Mumuahmuh…" Duo mumbled under what he hoped was a clean sock. His current position was now on top of Heero's bed. Normally he would have been jealous over the fact Heero had received the more comfortable bed. Still, even with the ropes tied to the bed post to hold him down, it was more comfortable than his own. He would have to talk to Quatre about that after he calmed down.

"I AM GOING TO CUT OFF YOUR BRAID!"

After he calmed down a lot.

"Let me ask you one question," said Trowa standing over the bed. "Was it worth it?"

Tears filled the braided man's eyes.

The small destroyed room was now filled with everyone except Heero and Relena. All deciding on what Duo's fate should be.

Dorothy leaned against her boyfriend. Tears filled her eyes. "I don't know why you thought Heero would hide it _inside _the tree…"

Dorothy's tree had been everything short of burnt to the ground. Duo had claimed to be looking for the ring but they all feared his intentions had been a little more sinister. They knew how he felt about that tree.

"Mumuahmuh…"

Milliardo and Noin stood at the edge of the room in silent satisfaction, both debating on whether or not to inform their friends on the likely situation going on in the next room.

"I would like to second that," Wufei replied to Quatre's earlier comment.

Duo now stared at the Chinese man with pleading eyes.

"I don't see why the ring is such a big deal anyway," said Sally standing next to Wufei.

Wufei turned to answer. "He thinks he's defending his friends honor,"he rolled his eyes. "Or something like that..."

Milliardo and Noin's snickers didn't go unnoticed by the other occupants of the room.

"What's so funny?" asked Catherine.

"Duo, you completely trashed Heero's room," Noin began with a large grin. "His lap top is in peaces, not to mention Dorothy's tree. Where is the on place you've yet to look?"

Duo's eyes went wide.

Quatre burst out laughing. "Oh if she's right, I really am going to kill you Duo."

"No, I'm going to kill Duo."

Everyone turned to look at the perfect soldier and the princess standing in the door way. A million questions flooded the minds of their friends but when they saw Relena's tear stained face and ring less finger, they left it alone.

Duo started to pull forcefully to no avail on the ropes that held him down.

"Don't worry about going easy on him Heero; your only pair of clean socks are in his mouth. He forced our hand," Hilde glared down at him.

"He was out of control," said Quatre and Trowa nodded in agreement.

"He killed my tree," sobbed Dorothy.

Relena smiled. "Well in that case I think he should be forgiven."

That comment earned her a nasty glare from Dorothy and Duo seemed to be laughing but couldn't quite manage it with a sock stuffed in his mouth.

Milliardo and Noin gave Heero and Relena Questioning looks while Hilde went to untie her boyfriend and Wufei and Sally dragged Quatre and Dorothy forcefully from the room.

"Did you do it?" Duo asked after pulling the sock from his mouth.

"Let's go!" Hilde grabbed Duo's braid and dragged him behind the others out of the room with Trowa and Catherine following suit.

Milliardo wanted to begin his line of questioning but from the look on his sister's face he couldn't be sure how far the young man had gotten. Relena looked liked she had just been crying- that might be a good sign-might be a bad sign. There was no ring on her finger but that didn't necessarily mean anything. Heero didn't seem particularly happy. But then again, how would he know?

"Before you ask any questions," Heero began. "We want to see all of you down stairs in ten minutes."

Milliardo and Noin just nodded and went to round up the rest of the group.

~*~

Every single one of them felt like small children waiting to be scolded by their parent's. Heero and Relena stood before them with arms crossed and bodies rigid, both appearing to be much larger than what they were.

"Catherine," Relena let out an exhausted breath. "You have been found completely innocent and for that I thank you."

"Innocent of what?" the red head asked. Guilty eyes made there way to the small girl who had apparently been just as ignorant as Relena this entire time.

"Trying to sabotage my and Relena's vacation," Heero answered monotone.

"Hey you know that's not-"Duo cut himself off, unsure of how much Relena knew.

"Noin," Relena said softly to her brother's wife. "You may not be completely innocent as you had knowledge of what's been going on. I don't think you had any malicious intent unlike the others and we found you in no way had any physical partaking."

Noin smiled and mouthed her apology while Quatre Duo and Trowa tried to hide themselves behind the women.

Relena's attentions turned to Dorothy. "Your Christmas tree was cruel and none of us appreciated it. I'm glad it's dead."

Dorothy's gaze shifted to unsightly mess on the floor and sighed. She still didn't get it.

Now it was Milliardo's turn. She looked over at the ashamed man. "If you are so worried about the babies you should have kept your nose to yourself. " She decided to leave it at that and let it sink in but she felt the need to add one more thing. "Next time you decide to take a trip on the good ship lollipop, take Duo with you."

Milliardo couldn't do much to hide his embarrassment so he just leaned in closer to his wife giving his sister and apologetic smile. He could find out how much she knew later.

"Trowa," growled Heero. "If you come within five feet of Relena, I will shoot you."

Trowa nodded. "Understood."

Relena and Heero now turned in Quatre's direction but Relena was the one who spoke. "I am still picking the mistletoe out of my socks Quatre!"

"Hey I don't know what you're talking about…"

"Bullshit," muttered Heero.

"Sally," Relena sighed. "Wufei doesn't deserve you. You need to learn to keep him in his place."

"Woman," growled Wufei. "You know full well I had nothing to do with this!"

Heero smirked. "Sure."

"This is unjustifiable! I had no part in anything! It was the clown, the tea drinker and the braided maniac!"

"However," Relena raised a finger to silence the angry Chinese man. "We would like to thank you…."

"Thank us for what?" asked Duo.

"Ok, everyone but you," said Heero.

"What are you talking about Yuy?" Milliardo asked confused as everyone else in the room.

Relena sighed and exited the room with Heero close behind.

"I can't believe they just left like that," Duo scowled.

They all sat in uncomfortable silence for the rest of the night.


	13. Babies And Crimper's

Chapter Thirteen: Babies And Crimper's

_Christmas Day_

"Seriously Dorothy?" Duo asked amazed holding up his present. "What am I suppose to so with a crimper?"

"Use it."

He observed the package before him and the demonstrations it showed on the back. "Do you have any idea how long this would take?" It appeared the man with extremely long hair was actually contemplating using the device…

Quatre continued to open his presents, all a girlish shade of pink. His mood elevated when he opened Duo's present and it revealed a very manly shade of gray.

"Thanks Duo!"

"Oh man, look at the back, couldn't forget your favorite color now could I?"

Quatre unfolded the sweats with a smile on his face, that smile faded quickly.

"Duo, you said you were getting those for Relena," said Hilde slapping her boyfriend on the back of his head.

The sweat pants Quatre held in his hands, when turned around had HOTTIE written in hot pink right on the back side.

"Creative, tweezers again," said Dorothy holding them out for everyone to see.

"You'd think she would get the hint after all these years," mumbled Duo.

The past two days the men had decided to ignore the elephant in the room. Judging by Heero and Relena's actions the men really weren't sure what to think. After the episode in Heero's bedroom Relena had obviously been in tears, with no ring on her finger. Heero didn't seem overly distraught, so it couldn't have been that bad?

When Duo approached Relena, he'd received a swift kick in the shins. Pacifist his ass.

Quatre was still overcome with guilt over his and Dorothy's choice of a hobby and decided after his involvement in the mistletoe scheme, it might be best to keep his nose out of his friends business. Or at least not approach them about it. There were other ways of retrieving information.

Trowa really wasn't sure if Heero was truly serious about the five foot rule but every time he passed by a mirror he decided it was best if he just assumed he was. For him approaching Relena on her relationship status was out of the question and he didn't think Heero would be all that forthcoming. Quatre would probably give him news later…

Milliardo knew something was up when Relena had pulled his wife aside yesterday. When asked she said all would be revealed in due time and that Relena was still a little upset about the past week so the men would just have to be out of the loop for awhile. Hell it wasn't fair, he was the one who hired his sister's true love so shouldn't he be one of the informed?

"The kitchen and women's place in it…" Sally read the book cover out loud, Wufei's Christmas gift to her.

"I didn't know you were an author Wufei." Quatre's mind was now swimming with ideas.

Duo pointed to the book. "Published and everything, wow!"

Sally said nothing and kissed Wufei on the cheek. Some things would never change.

"This has defiantly been the strangest Christmas ever," Duo said still holding the crimper.

"At least you didn't kiss me this year," Wufei only half joked.

"Can we just decide to come back here next year?" asked Quatre hoping the group wouldn't be to put off in returning. He loved his sisters but he shuddered at the thought of having to visit them all if they found out he didn't have any plans.

"One condition," Duo's voice was directed to the female sitting next to his blond friend. "No crazy looking plastic abominations next year!"

Dorothy said nothing, momentarily reminded of her deceased tree.

"I think that's a yes, I don't think she can suffer like this again," laughed Quatre

"Will you be coming back next year Heero?" asked Hilde, knowing full well Heero had resigned and would no longer be obligated to follow Relena.

Heero looked up from his assortment of gifts. "Not if you plan on giving me anymore get-in-touch-with-your-feelings books," his eyes darted to Wufei.

"Don't judge, they did wonders for me," he said defensively. He wasn't about to admit Sally had tied him to a chair and read them one by one out loud.

"Come here Hilde," Duo held out the now plugged in crimper. "Let me do your hair!"

The mental picture Hilde got of her pixie cut turned into some sort of crimped up mess was repulsing, she didn't love Duo that much. "How about no?"

"Wufei?"

"No."

Duo's eyes ran down the length of Milliardo's platinum blond mane "Zec-"

"No."

While Duo was arguing with every person who had a head of hair Relena walked over to her sister in-law and laid and encouraging hand on her shoulder. She'd noticed she was about ready to burst and figured now was as good a time as any.

Noin took a deep breath. "I have a surprise."

Heero came up behind Relena and took her hand, an action that certainly did not go unnoticed by their audience.

"I'm pregnant," Noin said excitedly.

In that instant Noin was swarmed with hugs and congratulations, they burst into tears as they started talking feverishly about baby showers.

"Ok wait stop," Said Noin wiping the joyous tears from her eyes. "Someone else has a surprise."

All eyes went to Heero and Relena. Relena smiled as Heero kissed her forehead, her slender fingers wrapped around the long silver chain that had been hidden underneath her shirt revealing a diamond ring.

Duo wasn't sure what came over him when he pulled the former assassin into a violent embrace. "Congratulations man!"

Heero surprised everyone by returning the hug, and now it was Relena turn to be pummeled by the females.

"See we didn't ruin everything," said Quatre barely in control of the flood that wanted to loose itself from his eyes.

"Wow I'm going to be an uncle and a best man!" Duo was almost bouncing off the walls.

Heero shook his head "No I have other plans for you actually…"

"Uncle?" asked Noin.

Relena shrugged. "Just go with it!"

As everyone celebrated the upcoming birth and marriage…

Twenty minutes later it was Duo who discovered Milliardo had been passed out cold.

~*~

He recognized this place; it was exactly as he'd remembered.

"Good bye ship…" he waved and continued down the yellow brick road.

He smelled something burning and looked around. He couldn't see any smoke. He heard the sounds of laughter and decided to follow. The babies were in the same field he'd left from. They seemed happy; he wondered where his crown was.

"Why am I here?" He asked one of the babies.

"Because you're one crazy mother fu-"

"Shut yo mouth!" another baby cut in.

It didn't feel the same. He wanted to go back home.

"He's trying to kill you," one of them whispered. "I can smell death."

Milliardo sniffed the air, the baby was right. The burning smell was getting stronger. He looked around in the field for a door and couldn't find one.

Defeated he sat down on a rock "I don't know what to do…"

The heavens parted and an angel descended from the clouds. The angel looked exactly like Treiz.

"My child," the Treiz look alike cooed. "I have a gift for you."

Milliardo stared in awe and reached out his hands. "Will it help me return home?"

A pair of ruby red slippers materialized in Treiz's hands. "Just put them on a click your heels three times, and then repeat after me…"

The shoes floated toward him and he did as commanded and slipped the shoes onto his feet. "They fit perfectly," he sighed hoping they wouldn't disappear when he returned home.

"There's no place like home…"

"There's no place like home…"

"There's no place like home…"

~*~

His body ached as if he'd been thrown around and his head felt extremely hot. Was he coming down with the flu?

He sat up and looked around the room, it was his room. Why was he laying on the floor of it?

Suddenly the memories starting coming back, Noin and the baby, his sister getting married…

So he hadn't had another mental breakdown. This time it was a dream. His feet were cold. Had someone taken off his shoes? He looked around and only saw barren floor. Maybe he'd left them in the field where he had kicked them off?

He stood up; he should probably get downstairs quickly. Noin was probably furious with him, thinking he was scared of having a child. He didn't feel like dealing with that right now.

He stood up and smoothed out his attire and left the room. When he reached the living room his sister current position was on the lap of Heero Yuy, well they defiantly weren't hiding anymore.

Relena's eyes went wide when she saw him. "Oh Milliardo."

"No listen," he started, not noticing everyone held the same expression as his sister. "I'm sorry about earlier, I really am happy for the both of you."

Relena started to laugh uncontrollably and Heero just looked plain worried. Worried about what? Didn't he just say he was happy for them?

"DON"T YOU LOVE IT?" Duo said popping up in front of the much taller man. "IT TOOK ME TWO HOURS!!"

He looked to his wife and she pushed away Duo. "Somebody, go put that man in a safe place."

Quatre and Trowa came to Duo's rescue as Noin turned her husband toward the mirror.

Fifteen inches, literally fifteen inches his hair stood from his body in a curly crimpy mess.

"DDDDDUUUUUUUOOOOO!!!!"

Three hours later…

"Done," Wufei said satisfied with Milliardo at his side.

"It's so much worse," Hilde looked at her boyfriend who was tied and handcuffed to the chair.

"Is it worse than his?"

"Justice is served," Wufei said eyeing his handy work. The pair had succeeded in corn rolling Duo's hair to his ears then crimping the rest.

"Much worse."

Quatre set down his glass of tea. "So uh, about next year…"


	14. Hot Pants

Chapter Fourteen: Hot Pants

"_**Butler found to be source of tabloid leak." **_

"_**The exclusive interview, why did he do it?" **_

"_**Rumors concerning former Gundam pilot's sexuality found to be false." **_

"_**Relena Peacecraft, where is she now? Literally, we can't find her." **_

"_**Quatre Winner and Dorothy Catalonia's multi million dollar contract for their new screen play from their popular series 'JUSTICE MAN'**_

~*~

August 1st

Ryan turned off the ignition and wiped the dripping sweat from his brow. He glared for the twentieth time that day at the new standard issue door they had just put on his truck, at the end of June. What good was it for them to finally after a couple hundred years to finally give them doors but not think to install AC? The cabin felt like a sauna and he knew outside wouldn't be much better.

He looked at the address on the mail box and checked again on his electronic pad. It was the right address and he reluctantly stepped out of his truck and into the hot summer sun. He noted the name looked vaguely familiar but he couldn't quite place it, he didn't think he had ever delivered to this address before. He grabbed the one package he had to deliver to this address and made his way toward the door.

He noticed a lot of cars were parked out front; they must be having a party. The house wasn't by any means large it was rather quaint in its own way. It was very cliché with its white picket fence.

He groaned as he trudged up the path, in his heavy duty brand new pants. They came with the door. Shorts had been banned per Quatre Raberba Winner. Of course the shorts hadn't been banned till the weather had warmed and each employee was cruelly forced into wearing the twenty pound made for arctic weather pants.

"When I see the little blond pip squeak…" he muttered.

Ryan couldn't shake the eerie feeling in the pit of his stomach when he reached his hand out to ring the door bell as he heard an all too familiar shriek from inside….

"_YOU CAN'T DO THAT HEERO ITS BAD LUCK TO SEE THE-" _

'_CRASH'_

He recognized that voice.

"_BUT I NEED HELP!" _

"_YOU DON'T NEED HIS HELP!!" _

His mouth went dry; he recognized all the voices so far. Why had fate doomed him so? Turning slightly he pondered just ringing the door bell and running, his superiors wouldn't notice that he hadn't gotten the signature, right? Ryan looked back at his truck then down at his pants. He doubted his luck ran that way.

It was time to man up; surely the tabloid issue would have been forgotten.

'_DING DONG'_

They probably wouldn't even recognize him.

The door opened to reveal a very familiar old man, who was now dressed in a suit and didn't reek of alcohol.

The old man's eyes lit up. "Ah it's you!" he said excitedly. "Master Yuy, your gentleman lover has arrived."

Ryan's eyes grew wide as another familiar face rounded the corner and eyed him with an amused expression. "You're here as a guest Pagan, Relena would be quite put out if she knew you were answering the door."

The old man let out a deep chuckle. "Habit I suppose."

Just then the female he remembered with the long flowing platinum blond hair passed by and gave a Heero a distraught look. "I can't do it, I can't do it, I can't do it!"

Ryan still couldn't get over how deep her voice was and wondered what was bothering this young woman so much. She was clinging to a box of tissues and couldn't quite manage to form a complete sentence.

Heero placed a comforting hand on the young woman's shoulder. "Zech's, all you have to do is walk."

Zechs? What an odd name for a girl.

"Pull yourself together soldier," another woman half shouted at the female who was not in the fetal position in the corner of the foyer.

"Noin," the older gentleman said sternly. "This is a very emotion day for him; you should show more compassion toward your husband."

Him? Husband? That was a man? Men were not supposed to have hair prettier than any female he'd ever seen before. It was just wrong. Ryan looked over at what he knew now to be a man and felt a little sorry, his current position was rather degrading.

Noin rolled her eyes. ""Unless you want to see him in a dress singing I feel pretty for an hour straight I suggest you help me help him."

The old man, Oh wait it Pigeon, or was it Pagan? He remembered Relena's distress over the name and decided it would be best for him to refer to the older gentleman as Pagan.

Pagan looked down genuinely confused while Heero and Noin shared a secretive smile.

"The babies…"

Heero's shoulder's slumped. "Not again."

Ryan eyed cautiously what he'd previously thought to be a female with a long braid earlier. Now he wasn't so sure. As what he decided to assume was a boy walked in he was dressed head to toe in priest garb. He didn't think women went around wearing that sort of clothing.

The braided priest smiled a wicked smile as he looked for the first time at the crazy man. "TO THE TUB," he sounded strangely excited.

"Um excuse me?" Ryan was starting to wonder if he was transparent to these people.

Noin sighed with relief. "Its here, finally!"

"What did you order Noin?" asked Duo.

"I'm sorry," said Noin grabbing the electronic pad to sign. "My husband is incapacitated at the moment so I'll have to sign for him."

Ryan nodded as she signed.

"Smelling salts Duo, I can't have him ruining his tux," she grabbing the package and rummaged through it. "We can't throw him in the shower like this."

For the first time since his arrival the man with the braid looked at him. "Hey there, funny seeing you here!"

Ryan nodded saying nothing, hoping this visit would me much less eventful than the last.

"RYAN!" a familiar voice called excitedly. "I see you're wearing the pants! Isn't it wonderful? I had them triple the insulation so you'll feel like you're in a sauna in January!"

Ryan felt his annoyance shrink to nothing; the blond man looked so genuine. "Thank you."

Quatre's mood perked up even further when he seemed to get an idea. "You should stay," he pleaded.

"Stay for what?" he asked noticing for the first time the men were in tuxes and Noin was wearing a long flowing lilac dress.

"The wedding I am performing," Duo said proudly.

"Who's wedding?"

In that instant Heero was next to him and swung an arm over his shoulder and gave him a devilish smirk. "Yours and mine of course, sweet heart."

The priest looked him up and down. "The bride is supposed to wear white; I guess we'll have to make do."

So they defiantly hadn't forgotten the tabloid incident. This was their strange sense of humor. "I'm sorry about that, honestly."

Heero removed his arm. "Don't worry about it."

Pagan chuckled. "I guess we all tried to help in our own ways, as we all saw the situation a bit differently."

Ryan remember a few months ago when the butler had confessed to leaking information to the tabloids. He'd read an interview where the butler had stated if he put the idea out there maybe the two kids would get together. Why he needed to go to such a great length, no one could figure out. Ryan chalked it up to all the alcohol the man probably consumed on his off days. He never would forget seeing the old man with wrinkly pasty white legs in his bright white short, shorts.

"So are you going to stay?" Duo asked.

Ryan looked at his watch; it was his last delivery of the day. "I would be honored."

Noin put the salt under her husband's nose and he pushed them away. "No get me the shoes…"

"What shoes?"

"Treiz knows where they are…"

~*~

"Do you Heero Yuy take Relena Peacecraft to be your lawfully wedded wife, for richer or poorer in sickness and in health?"

The sun was setting just above the altar. Ryan swore he would never see another bride as beautiful as the soon to be Mrs. Yuy. Her dress was simple and elegant, yet so was she.

The woman with the long eyebrows leaned closer to him. "You know that's not really his name. I don't why he is still using it. Doesn't it sound fun? Yuy, Yuy, Yuy…"

"I do."

He ignored the blond woman and continued to watch as Relena slid the ring onto her husband's finger. Milliardo was in tears and had nearly broken down when Duo had asked who was giving the young woman away. Ryan was sure had his wife not intervened he would have dragged his sister down the opposite end of the isle.

"Do you Relena Peacecraft take Heero Yuy…?"

Duo paused then looked intently at Relena. "You know it's not to late to back out…"

"Duo!" Hilde called from the front row.

"Last chance," he said in a singsong voice.

"I do!" Relena smiled as Heero placed the ring on her finger.

Duo cleared his throat. "I now pronounce you husband and wife. I may now kiss the bride!!!"

"DUO!"

**THE END**


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